Etiquette Question - WWYD??
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| Fri, 10-13-2006 - 8:25am |
We got an invite to a kids halloween party in the mail. It said "Michael* and Sarah* Halloween Party" and then gave the place and date and then said "Please join us for some ghoulish games, freaky fun, and frightening food! Bring a flashlight for a spooky game. We ask that the parents stay for the fun!!" and then the RSVP ph#s. The envelope didn't have any of the kids names on them, and seeing as they each have 26 kids in their class, not all of whom I know, I wasn't sure who was invited. Finally, a few days later, Jenny said Michael was in her class and talking about the party, so I knew who exactly was invited.
Anyway, the problem is this. Jenny is a twin. Do I just take her or can Ian go too? So when I rsvped, I asked who all was invited (the invite wasn't overly specific, after all) and asked if Ian could come along. She said she was just trying to keep it all in the same age range so the little kids don't get run over by the big ones (understandable) and said it was fine for Ian to come.
But now I'm doubting myself. Was what I did the right thing? I would never expect for them to go to the same birthday party, unless both invited, but then they both get the opportunity to do that throughout the year and those are usually gender specific anyway. It's just hard to tell one 6yo that his sister gets to go to a kids halloween party and he doesn't. But then again, these kids invited are in Jenny's class, and Ian's not. I don't know...
The women throwing the party seemed to believe they were going to have a low turn out, anyway, so maybe I helped? lol.
So did I commit a hideous act of bad manners, what do you think?
Erin
*some names have been changed :o)
Edited 10/13/2006 9:37 am ET by happy_mom-0-3

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I was laughing a little as I read your dilemna.? I was always taught that etiquette was meant as a tool to make everyone feel comfortable in social situations.
As long as you asked about your other twin and made it clear that you would be fine with a no- ie understanding to restrictions due to gender, age, finances, space. I don't think you didn't anything impolite.
I have had similar situations-not with twins- but with 4 children and being invited to events for parents and child (what to do with other 3 kids). I just gathered up courage and started by saying that i would totally understand if the answer was no. However was it possible for the others to come. This gives the person an out and the heads up that you won't be huffy if your request is denied
I hope you all have fun!
Tina
The twins had a blast and it was no problem at all. And I made up a kick but hostess gift for the two moms that threw the party, with little things for them and their kids. They had an inflatable bounce machine in the basement, played games in the living room, and had made a maze out of boxes in the garage, lol. It was supposed to be held outside but it was just too cold. They had actually had their carpet covered with that sticky kind of plastic they put over carpet in new homes to keep it nice, very smart, I thought. They invited all the kids in two classes and ended up with around 25. Way braver than me.
The twins were very excited, this was actually their first party ever, bday parties included, another reason telling Ian he couldn't go would've been too sad. There were a couple of moms there who had to bring babies with them, poor things, and we weren't the only sibs in attendance. The boy at whose house the party was thrown has a crush on Jenny, I think, lol. He kept coming to get her, by the hand, and saying "let's go bounce, Jenny!" like she was the only one there. She inspires this out of boys, it seems, and it scares me a little. She said the other day another boy at school accidentally almost kissed her and when she pointed this out he said if he had kissed her he would've liked it!! LMBO! And another boy seranades her with love songs on the bus. How am I supposed to feel about this??
Anyway, thanks for your take on it, ladies, nice to know I'm not the only one that thought it was ok, even if I doubted it later.
Erin
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