Good Morning! Child spacing? Any BTDT..

Avatar for ryleighsmommyxoxo
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Good Morning! Child spacing? Any BTDT..
22
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 8:25am
advice or opinions?

Ryleigh is 9 months old and I'm trying to figure out when would be a *good* time to try again. 2 year difference between children? 3 year? Any pros/cons to small/large child spacing?

Also...I'm still nursing and have not seen AF since I got pregnant. Is it possible to get pregnant and not have AF?

Thanks,

Kacey & Ryleigh (9 months)

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Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 8:35am
Well, there is a 7 year difference between my 1st and 2nd, 18 months between my 2nd and 3rd, and will be 19.5 months between my 3rd and 4th.

Since I'm pretty sure you're not planning to wait 7 years, LOL, I can tell you that having them under 2 years apart is tough at times, but it does get easier. I honestly believe that 2 years apart is probably pretty close to ideal spacing for most people, but I'm just not patient enough to wait that long, LMBO. Truthfully, however the spacing works out, you deal with it one way or another.

GL with whatever you decide!

~Kendra

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 8:51am
Hi Kasey! My kids are 19months apart and I *think* I like it that way, LOL! Although, we have our times that are difficult that they are so close, we also have LOTS of things I like about the closeness in age. I liked that I wasn't too much out of *practice* with the baby stage, LOL! Now that Rem is almot 3yrs and Saige is 15months, they play together and keep each other occupied when I really need to get things done! The one Con that comes to mind is that for a while I had two in diapers and on the bottle at the same time(Rem didn't give up his "Baba" till 22months)but still wasn't all that bad. Of course, everyone has be to sure of their decision when to have the next child but in my case, I am really glad that mine are close in age. On the selfish end, I like the fact that when Saige gave up her Bottle...that's IT! We are only having 2 children so I don't have to do the bottle thing again. Plus, once I get Saige potty trained...again NO MORE DIAPERS! LOL!!! Good luck in your decision! I'm sure there are also pros to having them spaced out more too.

Have a great day!

Misty

Avatar for shmode
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 9:07am
Hey Kacey! Well, my dd's are 21 months apart, and I'm happy with the way we chose to do our spacing. But as with any age, they do fight. I don't think there's any right or wrong way to space out the children. What you should probably consider is *you* and only you. You are the SAHM who has to deal with 2 little kids so you have to be the one to be ready for this so I think I'd base my decision on that.

As for the getting pg? Oh yeah, you can get pregnant as early as the first time after you've had babe(I have 2 cousins who are 11 months apart!!!yeesh! but that's obviously not a problem for you!LOL!), so if you are not wanting to be pregnant now, I'd try and be careful. HTH!

jody

Avatar for ryleighsmommyxoxo
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 9:17am
Thanks Kendra, I am leaning more towards 2 years apart. Ryleigh is *very* active/busy so I keep wondering if it's best to wait before having another one....but on the other hand she *loves* being around other children so maybe sooner is better than later.

I am just kind of hoping for a *surprise* so that I don't have to decide :0) Ryleigh was *very* planned (I wanted to finish teaching the school year...she was born June 30!). A surprise might be fun this time!!

Kacey & Ryleigh (9 months)

Avatar for ryleighsmommyxoxo
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 9:24am
Misty, I love your children's names! My DH & his brother are 14 months apart and they are really great friends now....I would really like that for my children too. A agree that it would be nice to have the children *sort of * in the same stage at the same time. It probably makes planning family outing a lot easier!

Thanks for your BTDT advice!

Kacey & Ryleigh (9 months)

Avatar for ryleighsmommyxoxo
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 9:29am
Hi Jody, thanks for your BTDT advice! Just wondering...did your cousin get pregnant before AF returned? I'm not sure why I am so confused about this....for some reason I thought AF *had* to return to ovualate. I've heard many different things from different people. I'm not really sure when AF will return....Ryleigh nurses *a lot* day & night.

Thanks,

Kacey & Ryleigh (9 months)

Avatar for cl_nestey
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Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 10:09am
Hi there,

It's all up to you, really. How close do you want them to be? Are you intent on spending as much one on one time with Ryleigh before another comes along?

Ours are 16 mos apart, and we intended to have them close in age. I think 2 years is a good space, and it is possible to get pg while nursing even if you haven't had a period. Should we be excited for you? ;o)

Good luck and let us know what happens!

Avatar for ryleighsmommyxoxo
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 10:21am
I sure hope I'm not pregnant right now :) I'm taking the BCP right now...I guess until we decide what we want to do. I would like to wait AT LEAST until Ryleigh is 1 year old before TTC....I'm think more like trying next Christmas to have a fall baby (Ryleigh will be just over 2 by then). We'll see!

Kacey & Ryleigh (9 months)

Avatar for jess_jugs
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 10:24am
WEll, my girls are 2 yrs & almost 3 mos apart & this baby will be 2 yrs & 4 mos younger than my 2nd dd. I think that the age difference is perfect- both my girls were potty trained by 2, they're pretty independent & can do things themself, etc. I have a friend who just had a baby a couple weeks ago & her other dd is 18 mos. She's really struggling because her older dd is still so dependent on her for everything. My brother & I are also 18 mos apart & I know that my MOm had her hands full when we were little!

I think a little over 2 yrs is a great age difference, but that's what seems to work for us. Also, good for you for still nursing!! I nursed my first dd for 21 mos, 2nd dd for 18 mos & plan on nursing this one as long as possible too. You *can* get pg w/ no AF, but it's not as common. Do you chart your cycles?

Anyway, I don't think that I got a chance to welcome you, yet so Welcome!!

Hugs,

Jess, mommy to Hannah (4), Kiersten (2), & girl #3 EDD 6/27

Avatar for sarahmom2dayton
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 10:38am
Hi girl...

It looks like I'm definately out of the norm here, but we plan on waiting until Dayton is anywhere between 4 and 7 years old before we have another. I want a huge difference.

I guess the way I see it, this way I'll have undivided time for Dayton till he's at least in school. Then when he's off in school and we have another, he/she will have that one-on-one attention too.

Not only that, but we have a 2 bedroom house right now, and since I really don't want both kids in the same room, we'd have to wait on having another child until we move. And I really like where we're at right now.

Besides, maybe I'm just selfish, but both Shawn and I are nowhere near ready for another child at all soon.

Everyone's different tho, so I wish you the best of luck in your decision.

Hugs,

Sarah

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