How did you know you wanted

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
How did you know you wanted
14
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 7:59pm
another child? DS turned two last week and already people are starting in on 'when are you going to have another?". The thing is I have NO desire for another especially right now. A group of mommies I know got together a few weeks ago and it was literally- those with babies sleeping all night already have another or are planning one while those with little ones up half the night are like- no way! Iwas just wondering for those who have more than one- did you feel an intense desire for the second one the same as the first? I am TOTALLY not feeling a thing yet. I LOVE my DS but feel like I am just getting some time for myself. Most people say three years apart is a great way to go but that would mean getting PG pretty soon. And you can't even tell someone you're not sure if you want another one! Anyway, enough with the rambling, just wondering how you would know you are ready for another baby!

Jill

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Wed, 03-10-2004 - 3:53pm
I didnt read the others, but heres my thoughts- I have one daughter who is almost 5 and a half. She will be starting kindergarten this summer. People ( not family, because they know I will go off on them) are CONSTANTLY asking me when- when i tell them never- they ask WHY - I tell them that if they want to finance the diapers, formula, baby stuff which I no longer have any of, and stay up all night with a baby, I would be glad to consider it.

Having an only child is a CHOICE- just like having 3,4,5 kids is a CHOICE. Everyone wants to do what is best for them. My nerves couldnt HANDLE another one! lol! I enjoy being able to give her my full attention, knowing I will be able to get her (within reason) whatever she wants- be able to afford the sports or whatever other programs shes interested in - and knowing I will only have ONE college education to pay for....lol

You do what YOU want to do, WHEN you want to- if you want another- FANTASTIC- but dont let others pressure you into the whole - your child will be lonely thing. my dd has more friends than I can count! there is always someone over here playing or shes out riding bikes with them...she isnt lonely by ANY strech of the imagination. And she knows at night- she has me all to herself...and *I* wouldnt have it any other way....

Do what feel right to you. The rest will fall into place!

God Bless!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Wed, 03-10-2004 - 4:29pm
Amen!

I only have one and there is no way I want another baby. We are going to get that PERMANENTLY taken care of soon. People think we are crazy. I think my friend with 3 kids under 5 is crazy, but to each his own. I love my son more than anything in the world, but the thought of going through pregnancy and babyhood again makes me want to pull out my hair!LOL

You may end up having a baseball team, but you need to make that decision with your hubby. Does he want more? Many people I know take the "lets see" approach...they don't try, but they don't prevent it either. It really works for many families. Perhaps that is an option for you. Me? If it is BC, I am using it!!!

Ejkdmom Come visit my store: www.leorra.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 03-11-2004 - 6:36am
hi well im from australia, far away. well i'd love another baby but hubby and I have been trying for two years, well I am so sick of people thinking the same thing, but I cant do any more we are trying. I know it is not the same but hey I know how you feel, I just feel guilty because I havent fallen pregnant yet. I had a scare about two months after rachel was born and I wasnt ready than, you know when you look at other mums with bubs, you look at little baby clothes and prams and you feel all gooey everytime you see anything to do with new born babies. Hope this has helped take care mitty
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Thu, 03-11-2004 - 7:25am
I'm just curious:

For the poster who said that she wants to only have one daughter so she can give her everything she wants (sports, college education, etc.) What if she wants a sibling to play with?

Just curious, really, wondering what parents do when the kids start begging for a brother/sister.

Thanks, Melissa

Meldi

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