how do i tell boss i changed my mind...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-1999
how do i tell boss i changed my mind...
4
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 10:17am

i've never been the stay at home mom type. when i had my first son 4 yrs ago it was a given that i'd go back to work. now i'm in a different situation remarried and just had my second child 6 weeks ago. i'm only halfway through my maternity leave. thru my whole pregnancy i said i would be out 12 weeks and come back. i love my job... i love the clients, my coworkers, my boss is AMAZINGly supportive, and i love what i do.

however, my oldest son misses the cutoff for kindergarten by two days and isn't emotionally ready yet anyway. so he has one more year in daycare. with the cost of putting two kids in daycare, i'll only bring home about $70-80 a week for a full week's work. i'm not working for the insurance benefits, so that's no issue. so i'd really be working for my "sanity" at the value of only $70-80. i don't think that's worth it. we've got so much we are saving up for as a family.

i've done alot of thinking and the most cost effective thing for my family is for me to stay home for a year. i can be with the baby and keep my oldest in daycare. that way we could still save and i won't feel like i'm spending valuable time away from my family for pennies. i don't think i could stay home forever since i love my work and would go stircrazy at home.

since i've totally changed my original plan i don't know how to tell my boss. i'd like to go back to work there since they have been so great to me over the last 2 years. but i know that legally they don't have to hold my job for me and could tell me to pound sand.
and also, his wife is pregnant due any minute.... i don't want to look like a jerk!!

he sent me this email:

"Good afternoon, I hope everyone is doing ok. I was curious if you had a return date in mind.
Eight weeks would be July 5th. Twelve weeks would be August 3rd.
Selfishly, my wife is already 1 cm dialated and we may be having the baby sooner than later.
I wanted to coordinate with our other office regarding them sending someone down to he.
Thanks"

how do i approach this so i can go back there next september when my oldest goes to scool and we only have one daycare to worry about??

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2006
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 11:09am

My advice is to just be honest...you have thought it over and your situation has changed since you left.

One idea....could you possibly work part-time, or maybe from home. That is what happened with me. I go into the office one day a week and do some odds and ends at home. This way I can stay home with my ds and not go too insane. It can not hurt to ask...

I hope you can find a solution that will work for everyone.

Sarah





iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2005
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 11:33am

I agree about being honest and perhaps you could compromise.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2007
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 2:33pm

I don't really know how to go about trying to get them to keep your job for a year while you stay home. But you could just be honest about everything. Tell them that whats best for your family right now is for you to not work for the next year until your son is ready for school basically because the finances don't add up. Maybe they'll offer you a raise to come back and that will make the difference.

Personally I think your boss is a very selfish man trying to make you put your job before your family because HIS wife is getting ready to have a baby. HELLO? YOU just had a baby. You already told them you'd be out for 12 weeks. He can replace you anyway, however temporarily or permanently. If he wants you to care about his wife's impending delivery, he should show some care for you.

Tarra

Tarra

mommy to

Noah (10/13/05)

and

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2007
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 3:22pm

I haven't read the other response, so this maybe repetitive.

 

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