I love being a stay-at-home mom!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2003
I love being a stay-at-home mom!
12
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 10:39am
Hi everyone,

I am a stay-at-home mom to a 7 month little girl. She is the best thing that has happened to my families life. She is a lot of work and keeps me on my toes. I was just wondering if anyone else got comments from friends that were not sahm's like their life is so much harder and yours is so much easier because you are home. Don't get me wrong, I think my life is wonderful because I am home with my daughter and I wouldn't change anything. It is just annoying that some of my friends think that I do nothing all day but watch tv and sleep or something like that. Well I just had to vent and see if anyone else is experiencing this as well.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 11:47am
Most of the time those comments come from jellousy, from people being envious and not seeing how it is possilbe for them. Or the fact that they like their work and that can make them feel guilty because they don't want to stay home or simply because a lot of the time people want to talk and they always say the wrong thing and end up being offensive even though they didn't mean to. Try to think of the person and is their intent to hurt you...usually not.

Laura from Utah, mom of:

Deven 11

Amber 10

Bryen 9

Jered 8

Mikel 6

Ceaira 4

Taran 2

Talyn 1.5

Zane 0.5

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 11:50am
O yea one more thing. Even my husband is envious at times but would never want to trade jobs with me. He has great respect for what I do but it is also coming to the acceptance instead of getting offended that we do have it easier in a lot of ways. If I have had a long hard night I don't have to get up and have everyone dressed I do have the luxury of staying in my pj's or trying to catch a nap here or there. There are certainly perks to being a stay at home mom and that doesn't make us bad or any less.

Anyway hope that all made since.

Laura from Utah mom of:

Deven 11

Amber 10

Bryen 9

Jered 8

Mikel 6

Ceaira 4

Taran 2

Talyn 1.5

Zane 0.5




Edited 1/8/2004 11:51:59 AM ET by northmama

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2004
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 12:38pm
I am with you about loving staying at home with the kiddos. And though there are people out there who think we do nothing all day long, I am quite fortunate that most of the people around me are SAHMs too or used to be.

I say to those who think we do nothing all day- who makes breakfast(not just a bowl of cereal or fast food either), fixes kids school lunches, watches my kids walk to school, cleans the kitchen after breakfast and then later after lunch, makes the beds, sweeps and mops the floors, does the laundry for my family of 6, feed the baby, change baby's diapers, puts baby down for nap, entertains other child, prepares meal for older family members and for baby as well. All the while trying to make sure the house is at least some what clean just in case someone comes by and for the hubby when he comes home. If that is called nothing, then so be it!

mohsin6mosiggy thanks to Bianca(volt

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 8:23pm
YEP!!!!! I'm right with you there on the my life is so much harder than yours. But then I always laugh when they bring the kids over to play on their days off because they are tired of trying to entertain them while doing their housework. Shelley
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2003
Thu, 01-08-2004 - 10:22pm
Yep, I get the comments all the time!

Dona

Mommy to CJ {03.21.03}& Chantel {08.10.95}  Step~Mom to Carrington {08.12.92}

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2004
Fri, 01-09-2004 - 12:14pm
I understand completely.. I am a stay-at-home mom to two children..Jacob who is almost three and Cassidy who is seven months old. My own husband thinks I do nothing all day long...So I made him stay home with them and I went out for the day..let me tell you he sings a different tune now. Your friends will understand as soon as they have kids or you could invite them over for the day and let them see what it is like....Emily
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Fri, 01-09-2004 - 2:36pm
I get this attitude sometimes. Usually I just point out that I USED to be a single WOH mom, I know exactly what it's about. And in my opinion, my days were a LOT easier then. Now I am at home with 2 kids, I have my own business, help with my husbands business, and homeschool. Not a lot of time to "sit with my thumb up my butt eating bon bons" as one former "friend" so eloquently put it. While I do know some SAH moms that DO sleep and watch TV all day, the majority of us do not. I think most WOHM understand it's no cakewalk for us either. The negative people I have encountered were people that were jealous because they resented the fact that they HAD to work, and they wanted to be at home. I had problems with a former "friend", who kept saying how spoiled I was. Sure, she was the first one to drop her kid off with me when she needed daycare(and I didn't charge her a thing, because I knew she was struggling for money), but behind my back I was a "lazy pampered housewife who was to spoiled to get a job". I worked when I had to. I have a choice to stay home, I feel it is best for my family, and that's what I do. Don't let the negative attitudes of others get you down. You are doing the best thing for your family, and others who put you down for your choice are either ignorant, or jealous.
Megan
Megan
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2004
Sat, 01-10-2004 - 6:48pm
Megan's mom,

I know where you are coming from. I stay home w/ my 3 yr old twins and I have people ask me "are you ever going to get a real job?" or make comments about people that stay home like they are spoiled, "well, you know she doesn't work" as if cleaning the house and catering to everyone is not work. Don't get me wrong, I love being home w/ the kids and I know I'm fortunate to do so, but I get sick of the cr*p comments.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2004
Sun, 01-11-2004 - 6:00pm
I am a stay at home mom and LOVE it!!! I've seen too many horror stories of daycares and will NOT send my kid to one. I am lucky I have a husband to support me. We could use extra money,we live pay check to pay check. Have absoluty no banking, but thats okay with me, I don't need tons of money to be happy. I'm a great bargin shopper. I've gotten the guilt trip from a few people, I don't care what anybody says, I want to be the one to raise my kid. When she starts school and if I have no other kids by then, I will get a part time job.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2003
Sun, 01-11-2004 - 7:58pm
I agree with Megan - the negative people I've encountered are usually jealous that they "have to work" and I "get to" stay at home with my kids.

I have no problem admitting that for me personally, staying at home is heavenly! I love it! I like to clean and organize our house. I like to cook. I like having the time to pursue my own hobbies. And...most of all I LOVE to play with the girls and take the best care of them I possibly can. BUT for me, being a stay at home mom is NOT HARD. I have a five year old (in preschool part time) and a ten week old...so of course I do keep busy (I don't just sit around watching TV) but it's not stressful at all. Of course there are the colds, the tantrums, messes, etc. But for me personally that's not stressful. For me, working in a cramped cubicle with a huge inbox, catty coworkers, and a demanding yet ineffective boss...now THAT is stressful!

Other people are different though. It's a personal thing. I know that there are different situations in different families, other variables, but I have to admit, even as a SAHM myself I cringe/disagree when anyone says that being a SAHM is "the hardest job in the world" or "the most important job in the world". I don't want to anger anyone but from my point of view those claims are ridiculously untrue. I think of being a SAHM as a privilege. A luxury that DH & I are affording our family, that is a comfortable and positive choice for our children and family...but not a necessity or a "right". I guess I just get a little annoyed when some women (no one here, I'm speaking in general) think that EVERY mom has to stay at home or should be financially subsidized to stay at home. Crazy maybe but that's my POV :-)

Gretchen

Pages