I NEED HELP!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
I NEED HELP!!!!!!!
13
Mon, 07-26-2004 - 1:19pm
i really need help MY 2 YEAR OLD Victoria is maga hard headed i tried spanking her it don't work and i try having HER stand in a corner it don't work i even tried putting her to bed for time out all she do is play with her feet and fingers and every morning she wakes around 5am to chase the cats play in the cat litter goes though the garbage and mess with alot stuff i have a gate at her door but she climbs it and im scared she's gone break her neck one morning and I've to spank her for the samething every 10-15 mins she never been this bad i don't know what's wrong with her why is she acting out this bad?i take her out she dont even know how to act outside either!! shes worst outside!!! every day its a fight to take a nap to bedtime to dinner lunch breakfast it's always a fight she wasn't like this until i got preggo counld that be it? could she fell someone Ase is coming?or is it me? im very lost right now someONE PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!



Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Mon, 07-26-2004 - 1:31pm
I really dont have advice, cause you pretty much have dome things I would have done.
I just wanted to send some hugs your way and hope she calms down soon.

Lilypie Baby Days

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Avatar for cowsr93445
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2003
Mon, 07-26-2004 - 1:51pm
I don't really have any advice either. Maybe she's just trying to get attention. As a mom I know sometimes I focus on all the things I NEED to get done, cleaning, cooking, cleaning, errands, cleaning and forget the important things ~ my girls. The baby will just start acting up and while to me it seems like she's being fresh (lol) with the crying and whining, if I sit down and play with her for like 30 minutes or whatever, or even do things with her there, like folding clothes and stuff, she tends to behave a little better. The same thing with the 11 year old. It's hard being a mom, and clearly children have NO idea so they think (or at least this is WHAT I THINK THEY THINK) that we can give them the attention they want (sometimes need) 24/7. Y'know.


Good luck though....


~Tammy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2000
Mon, 07-26-2004 - 1:59pm
Have you seen this book? It's called The Challenging Child by Stanley Greenspan.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0201441934/qid=1088039819/sr=8-1/ref=pd_ka_1/102-1698034-8549758?v=glance&s=books&n=507846

I have also heard good things about Raising Your Spirited Child.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0060923288/qid=1088040132/sr=ka-1/ref=pd_ka_1/102-1698034-8549758

I think there are book excerpts of these at the links. Maybe one of them will seem like something that might help. Best wishes - Suzanne

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 2:10pm
Ahh...the terrible two's! I wish I could offer you some advice but I'm going through the same thing with my little guy. I have to lock him in the house to keep him from escaping! And his napping days are long gone. I'm also pregnant with our second baby. I don't know if he could be acting out because of that or that it's just a coincidence. But he is constanly making a mess and I'm constanly fussing at him over something. Just know you're not alone and if you ever feel like chatting feel free to drop me a note.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2004
Wed, 07-28-2004 - 12:54am
FIRST OF ALL, I THINK YOU SHOULD STOP SPANKING! ESPECIALLY IF ITS NOT WORKING. I PERSONALLY THINK THAT SPANKING A CHILD EVERY 10-15 MINUTES IS UNCALLED FOR! TRY TO IGNORE THE BAD BEHAVIOR, AND GIVE TONS OF PRAISE AND ATTENTION TO GOOD BEHAVIOR. IF ALL YOU ARE EVER DOING IS FOCUSING ON THE BAD, SHE MAY THINK THATS THE ONLY WAY TO GET ATTENTION FROM YOU. TO A CHILD, NEGATIVE ATTENTION IS BETTER THAN NO ATTENTION AT ALL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2004
Wed, 07-28-2004 - 1:45am
I just went through what you are going through not long ago. My advice would be to not give up and stay consistant. Your two yr old is probably both going through the terrible two's but, don't be discouraged. 2 yr olds just want lots and lots of attention any way they can get it. I remember the constant making messes and acting out. Here are some things we did and they seemed to help most of the time. One thing is when they make a mess not to clean it up so much. Leave it for a while or have them help you. Make a game out of it by having her help you. Also, when they see it's a clean room they want to make it a mess. You just have to let loose for a little while. And Yes there is a such thing as terrible 3's. I think it was worse at 3 rather than at 2. Another way to help you with punishing is pinching like on the leg. It worked for us. It hurt me more than it hurt him but, atleast you aren't wearing yourself out. Just be careful how hard you pinch because you don't want to leave a bruise. Also the last thing to do is to give her lots and lots of love. When i was pregnant with my second I remember I needed to make sure my first one felt just as much love as the little inside me felt. You also will need to do that once baby comes. I'm sure you know that but, do those little things that make her feel special so she will know. I hope some of this will work. I tried everything you mentioned and none of them worked for me either. Just don't give up and stay consistant!!!

Shanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2003
Wed, 07-28-2004 - 12:07pm
I can relate to you... It almost sounds as though you are talking about my 20mo. old dd. She too gets the cat litter by the handfulls and throws it across the room to make a huge mess. She plays in the dogs water bowl and she sits in the water that has spilled everywhere. She climbs up on our kitchen table and dances (she has fallen off a couple times) but she keep going back for more. When I fix her plate of food she feeds it all to the dog. I can go on and on. But, I guess with me expecting my 6th baby, Ive learned to ignore those times and just child proof. I moved the cat litter outside and just dont let the cats in right now. That is just nasty!! The dog bowl is hidden. I also send her outside with her sibilings and she plays her little heart out so in the evening she is so tired. Have you tried elimiating all sugars, such as cool-aid, fruit juices? Dilute those drinks or by the sugar free. I by the little bottles of water and she loves them. Red coolaid is a big no no... Something with the dye, and I can tell the difference, but I cut those things out when my older children were babies. We had the child gate problem too, we just took it down and let her run the house. I think she just wanted to be free like her brothers and sisters. She doesnt seem to get into so much now that she isnt confined, she is just very busy and very curious.

Good luck to you, I hope that you can find a way to deal.

Cyndi (#6EDD 9/24)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Thu, 07-29-2004 - 10:46pm
im happy to hear im not alone i thought it was just me not being a good mother now im 14wks preggo and about to put out my hair and i also have to put on a 2nd lock on my front door to keep her in the appartment on morning i fond the front door wide open with her dancing in the hallway i almost died someone could had took her all she could have push the button for the elevater i just cant stop crying somtimes i think i got pregnant at the worng time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Thu, 07-29-2004 - 10:52pm
first of all i made had type it worng or what ever but i dont spank her every 10-15 minutes i said i spank her and in 15-10 minutes she's back to the samething and i tried time out and i dont be all on the nev. things when she do good things i say yay and smile but it dont work so you give me some ideas then
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Thu, 07-29-2004 - 10:56pm
thanks shanna

Pages