I'm very sad

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2004
I'm very sad
5
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 3:02pm

Yesterday my FIl and MIL had a Steelers playoff party. My parents and my bro and his child were invited plus some other cousins and uncles. We had a blast.

Then as the nite came to an end my bro and I were standing in the kitchen talking about Erica,a girl he's been seeing. Erica has approached me 2x. The 1st time she wanted to know the scoop on my bro and I said I dont know how he feels about you we dont talk that much and Erica said that he told her that I dont fit in with the family. I have always felt that way and was upset that my bro would tell a stranger that. But she made me promise not to tell him. So I told my Dh and I had to hide the phone from him bc he too feels we are left out and was steaming. This was a couple months ago. Well last week as I was leaving girlscouts Erica approached me again and said that my brother told her that he was at my house b4 he came to her house and when she told my bro she wanted to get together with me and go out, he said" no way all she does is talk about me." I just laughed and left. I thought she was trying to just cause problems.

Well back to last nite I told my bro all that and he agreed she was a trouble maker. Then when he asked DH if he really believed what all Erica had said Dh said Yes I DO. My bro said FU and walked out. So Dh and I ran out the door calling him. He stopped and told Dh and I that we were ignorant cold hearted....... Meanwhile when my baby almost died my bro called me 1 time out of the month and 1/2 we were in the hospital and that was to borrow my 4 wheeler! So that came out and bro said you could have called me and you didnt. I started to cry and told him that I was more worried about my baby than maintaining a relationship with him and that he should had been calling. He screamed Shut up and put his finger in my face and proceeded to tell me I was awful. Then he told Dh and Me to F off and left. I am so hurt. I am so fed up with my brother and his crap. He has always treated me like crap and I have always been afraid to say anything. Bc I knew this would happen but I couldn't take it anymore when he started screaming at DH. I really cant believe DH didnt knock him out but Dh didnt want it to go that way.

While we were still at FILs, Dh's uncle took my kids and went to our house to wait for us we live 3 doors away.I was crying to MIL and she knows how it is and was trying to cheer me up. When we came home my DD said my bro stopped here and told her that he doesnt owe me an apology and left. Now my DD is upset and I am mad about that. Why drag the kids in it? I am done with him. It hurts bc we were real close but that was years ago. My stepmom said when you get older sibblings grow apart. Her and my dad are half the reason but thats another story. My parents and bro think they are better than everyone, brag up their stuff put down mine. My bro will even compare his dog to my dog. It just never ends. We try to brush it off but its hard. I have no other blood family in the area and let them all get away with alot. But now I have had enough.

Thanks for listening to me I just needed to tell someone. I feel like I am trapped on Jerry Springer! I am and was so embarrassed. Thanks Eileen




Edited 1/16/2005 3:10 pm ET ET by browneyebabies
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 4:40pm
Sorry for all the drama with ur bro. Why is it there's always someone that wants to be difficult? It sucks, because they're our family and we seem cold hearted to outsiders when we distance ourselves from relatives. My FIL is a JERK! So there's constant problems in our family, too. He's never seen my almost 19 mo. old and only seen Elise 2 times in her 3 yrs! I hope somehow things will work out.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 4:56pm

I'm so sorry you're going through this Eileen. I've always been really close to my brothers, so I can't say that I know how you feel, but I certainly can sympathize

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2004
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 6:47pm
Hang in there Eileen, I know how hard this can be. The only differecne is my brother and I finally talked, and got things straightened out. Worst part was, our mother was the one coming between us. Always complaining that we couldn't get along, then telling him I was saying things about him. Or, telling me he was saying things about me. It took an entire night of the two of us sitting at his kitchen table talking it all out. Now that my mother is gone we talk a few times a month. We live in different states, so it's not as often as we'd both like, but at least we get along now.
I agree with you 100%, he should never have said anything to your DD.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 10:15pm
I am sorry that you and your brother are not getting a long.
I hope things get better for you both.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2004
Mon, 01-17-2005 - 1:10pm
Thanks for the support. I am feeling better today and I am sure I will feel better everyday. I really love my in laws more than I love my own blood. They are all so snooty and stuck up. My DH wonders how I didnt turn out like any of them. I think I am the milkman's LOL Eileen