I've had it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2004
I've had it!
6
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 6:45pm
Ok, my son has been playing with my nephew that is 8. My sister just had a baby and I've been helping out and they came over last night. Anyway, her son has major major problems..I think he has ADHD, and he swears CONSTANTLY, and he teases Dominic non-stop. He tries to get all of this negative attention from us so he tease the crap out of Dom. Then Dom retaliates and Dominic usually gets put in timeout for hitting his cousin. (Which if I were Dom I would hit him,too, he wont leave Dom alone!) ANyway, today Dominic said "Mother F*er"...just out of the blue!! He told me his cousin told him to say that! OK, I watch Dom non-stop, but this little devil(my nephew) will whisper stuff in Dom's ear when Im not looking! Im am at wits end, we can't even be around our family anymore..we were going to go to my parents tonight,but my nephew is going, so, i'm not subjecting my son to that kind of behavior. WHat would you do? I feel wrong for keeping Dom away from his cousins, but it is really out of control, and i don't want Dominic turning out like them. Even if I keep close watch on him, things still happen :( im soo sad and angry by this. My Dh and I try soo hard to discipline Dom, and my sister barely does anything with her son and now it's rubbing off on my son :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
In reply to: kate923
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 8:13pm
I would not let my child around another child if they were rubbing bad things onto them. I dont care if it is a relative or not.
I think you have a right to keep bad and negative things from your child.
Maybe you can talk to your sister about this.
Good luck. I hope he does not say such horrible words again.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: kate923
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 9:52pm
Kate, (((hugs)))! I wouldn't want my girls around a kid like that either. 8 is definitely old enough to know better! Maybe you or your mom could talk to your sister about the way he acts.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
In reply to: kate923
Sat, 08-20-2005 - 3:46am

Ohhh...that's a tricky one.

While there's not much you can do about this when you're at someone else's home, I'm a firm believer that you can discipline someone else's child when they are in your home.

If your nephew acts inappropriately in your home - and your sister is doing nothing - I think that it's quite OK to say "that behaviour is unacceptable in my home" and give him a better alternative. If he keeps up the bad behaviour, warn him that he'll have to leave. If he chooses continue, carry out your threat. I know it's tough because it's your sister, but your home is your castle.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kate923
Sat, 08-20-2005 - 5:53pm
Sounds like more of a brat than ADHD.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
In reply to: kate923
Sat, 08-20-2005 - 8:15pm
As a person who grew up with ADHD, I agree with the pp that said it doesn't sound like ADHD, more like Tourette's.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2004
In reply to: kate923
Sat, 08-20-2005 - 8:25pm

I have a little bit of a different prospective on this. On one hand I am a mom and protecting my children is of utmost importance.


I also feel great empathy for this little boy. Children who act out this way do so because they just want attention...any attention. The trick is to teach him that with you he will get the positive attention he desires when he behaves in a positive way. I personally would be extremely firm with him. You are his Aunt and I would think you have every right to discipline him according to your beliefs. If he is acting up in your home then give him a timeout where he is isolated from your family. He should quickly pick up that you are serious and mean business.


I would certainly limit his time around Dom though. Maybe have him over when Dom will be taking a nap or going to bed an hour later. I would bet that your nephew would love some one on one attention with you.


My nephews do not dare disobey me or be disrespectful in my home. Do however be prepared for him

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