Mad at dh :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2004
Mad at dh :(
2
Sun, 06-26-2005 - 4:50pm
Ok.Im SOO mad at him. It is SOO hot here, about 90, so I figured we should take Dom swimming since we can't even be outside and not in a pool. So, I told Dh and he was like have fun..Im like oh, your not coming? Well, anyway, after an argument, he decided to come, but sat on his lazy butt for 2 hours while we were there. (Ohyeah, he said we had to have sex when we came home since he didnt really want to go...which is RIDICULOUS and it did NOT happen, lol.)
Well, he actually got up to get something to eat and get Dom a popsicle. He came in the pool with us for like 10 minutes maybe and just sat on the wall, didnt even play with Dom. I was soo upset seeing all the other dads playing with their kids, while my husband sat there and stared at us. They all looked soo happy, and at one point my son wa asking where his daddy was, and im like oh, "hes sitting on the chair".
OK, maybe swimming isnt the funnest thing for him, but couldnt he have pretended he was having fun for Dom's sake? Im just really upset right now, so he came home and laid in bed, keep in mind, im pregnant and we swam for about 3 hours, so, I'm a little tired. I put Dom in the bath and asked him to take Dom out because I wanted to run to the store to get something for dinner. SO, that turned into an argument, and he said he never does anything good enough for me, blah, blah blah. Which is NOT true, im not like that. He has just been annoying the crap out of me and I dont know why, hes been acting different and I CAN'T stand it anymore. Hes always like this in the summertime when we want to go swimming, he throws a fit like a little baby because he hates to swim and stuff. O well, I think he left right now, so Dom and I can relax a little without having him here. Now im thinking it was wrong to have this baby,I cant do all this stuff with 2 kids and no help from him. I dont know whats wrong with him, he usually helps me a lot. Thanks for listening.:(

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2004
In reply to: kate923
Sun, 06-26-2005 - 7:01pm

Kate,

So sorry you're having troubles getting dh to help with your son...that would definitely set me off, too, and actually, sometimes it's like pulling teeth with men to get them to do the family thing...ugh. It's like someone ingrained a 1950's mindset into their little brains...knock the little woman up and let her raise the kids and when I'm ready for them, I'll let them know. Geez. Not that I'm saying that's your dh..don't even know him...but it makes me crazy to hear how many of my friends have dh's who they have to practically beat to get them to do family stuff. I'm FINALLY getting mine to do that stuff lately (he just finished graduate school and has a fulltime job, so there was a little slack there), but he sometimes still get this priorities out of order. Like this morning...on Sundays, I finally started to ask him to get up with our ds on Sunday mornings since he usually has some computer stuff he likes to do b/4 church anyway. I have to be the one to actually WAKE up and get him up b/c he's a heavy sleeper and can't hear our ds over the monitor, no not even if it were all the way up. So I wake him up and spend about 20 mintues getting him out of bed. Then he gets our ds and is supposed to feed him (bottle AND breakfast) and take care of him until he comes up at 9 to get me up for church. Well, 3 out of the 4 Sundays I asked him to do that, he hasn't got me up for some reason, and I'm guessing it's b/c he has his stupid computer baseball lineup he gets caught up in and loses track of time. So I'll wake up like when church has started, and we miss completely. The one time we made it in 4 weeks was when I just woke up on my own and got up. So today, he comes up at 9:15 and says, it's such a beautiful day, do you really want to go to church...strange question. I go, um...YES, seeing as I asked you specifically to wake me at 9..I was awake, just wanted to see if he'd remember this time. So he brings up ds so he can take a shower and I say, what did he have for breakfast, and he says he hasn't eaten yet....HUH?! He says he's been too "busy" sending in his lineup...well,now we're going to be rushed or late. I say, you HAVE to feed him b/4 we go! So he goes off and I'm just flaberghasted...so your stupid baseball lineup is more important that FEEDING YOUR CHILD!? So I go down and say, you know, I think we'd better switch days...you do Saturdays from now on b/c you can't remember to feed him on time or get me up on time and then this happens. And he says, well, I don't have a lineup every Sunday, and I go, well, then why haven't you got me up 3 out of 4 Sundays? And why isn't ds fed? He says he likes to give him "time" between the bottle and food to let the milk settle...oh, good grief! No, it's b/c he gets on the damn computer and loses what he's doing and ds can just wait on him! So I say, well, I never wait btwn those and he doesn't need to have to wait until you are finished with your playing to EAT! and also, you can't seem to remember to get me up, so let's just change days. He couldn't argue...he didn't even know what to say. I mean, how ridiculous!!! The rationalization didn't even make any sense...so, to make a long story short....men are stupid? Maybe that's my point...hehe. I didn't mean to make this my rant session, but just know that I believe that men just don't think things through like we do. Have you heard of the Corpus Callosum theory? I'll post another post for that topic and you can read about it...enough of my ranting on your post. But, you are not alone.

Debbie

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
In reply to: kate923
Mon, 06-27-2005 - 11:31am
I am sorry that your dh is not so opt to doing more with your son.
I am lucky to have a husband who would rather bith the boys all day then be with me

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