MIL acting ridiculous - WWYD?
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| Tue, 05-24-2005 - 7:48am |
So, this weekend we are having IL's and dh's brother and his girlfriend and 2 children over. MIL told me to work with Jessie (BIL's girlfriend) and make the arrangements and just let her know the plan. Fine. Jessie suggested they bring their own meat and dish to pass. O.K. - if you want to, that is fine. My family does this frequently so I didn't think much of it. I emailed MIL and Jessie (so everyone has the same info) and last night MIL called, totally undone. She started yelling at DH telling him how, when she read that email, her heart dropped to her shoes. She and dad were so hurt that we asked them to bring their own meat. What? I think she is acting childish. She couldn't believe we would do that to them after all they have done for us, taking us to Florida, etc. Not to mention, Scott (dh's brother) painted our whole house for us last year when we were building, so why would we do such a thing? DH layed into her, telling her it was Jessie's idea, so why was she yelling at us? Well, then she says, we shouldn't have accepted the idea. DH said, well, you know Scott, he likes tenderloin, etc., so that is probably why Jessie said that. Then he said Nevermind, mom, don't worry about it, just bring a dish to pass. She said, well, now I can't do that, I will feel foolish. Sigh. Can't she get over it? Really, Mark and I never do anything that would intentionally hurt them, it was just an oversight, I guess. I really didn't think it was being harmful. Why should we host all the parties and foot the bill for everything all the time? We had Christmas last year, having Christmas again this year, had his dad's 60th here last year, 4th of July last year, etc. She said Dad and I have never, ever asked you to bring your own meat or beverages (neither did I, just meat). Well, then I started getting irritated because I thought, hey, your house, your party. My house, my party. Get over it!! I am so angry that she is acting so ridiculous over bringing a couple of hamburgers! Yes, I can certainly afford to provide their meat, but does she need to act so crazy? I guess that is why I'm upset. Her reaction is just plain stupid. DH and I just had her over at the beginning of May to celebrate her birthday and Mother's day. She thought it was wonderful (we do it every year) that we give her such a special day. We had cornish hens on the grill rotisserie, oven fried potatoes, and asparagus. Molly and I even made her a special cake. Does this sound like people who are doing this on purpose?
Sigh, I'm just venting here, because I think MIL is behaving so poorly over something so small. DH and his brother are both ignoring her behavior, saying, well, she will get over it. It's not that easy for me - I'm not good with conflict. It rarely happens so I don't know what to do. Should I just move on and forget about it, too?
Help!!
Wendy


It sounds like she overreacted big time. I have an aunt who does that and I play along and then BOOM! I have it out with her. I don't know your personality, but I don't just get over things either. I guess all you can do is ignore it though unless she brings it up at the dinner and then you may have a hard time containing yourself! My aunt always attaches strings to everything and I have been ignoring her for a couple of days. Unfortunetly it was over borrowing her car and mine is broken. Sometimes I get myself into trouble that way, but I am so hard headed I won't back down! I guess I'll walk to the store! Good luck!
-Robin
I would do it and nothtink much of it. I love having parties, but sometimes they can be expensive if you do it all the time and pay for everything.
Have fun with the family.
As mad and hurt as you are, remember it is just meat!
Wendy, Just try to forget about it. I know it is hard, cause I can hold a mean grudge..lol, but just try to ignore everything and be really happy when the day comes. I find that it gets the other person very mad when it does not seem to bother you. I am kinda glad I really don't have a true MIL, but the one that claims she is (dh's aunt) gets on my nerves. She would always say very ugly stuff about me (behind my back) and try to get everyone else to hate me also. All the cousins probably do hate me, but I don't care anymore. It use to bother me and I use to get so worked up about it, that it just wasn't worth it anymore. I think they are ALL JUST JEALOUS cause dh and I have such a strong love for each other (and they don't)...heehee. Anyway, try not to let it get you worked up. Don't worry, be happy!
Olivia
&nbs
~*~ Lauri ~*~
Proud Momma to Austin (9), Brandon (8),
Dylan (5) and Makenna (2½)
It sounds like you might have these troubles often with MIL....I hope I am not that way when my boys marry!
It is just me, but I would say nothing...but have 20 lbs of meat ready to cook..lol