Need Advice about 4 month Old Crying

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2003
Need Advice about 4 month Old Crying
2
Sun, 05-09-2004 - 2:03pm
Hi there, this board is GREAT! I need some advice... My almost four month old daughter has gotten into a really bad habit of crying when I put her down or anytime she doesn't like the situation she's in. I wonder if I am spoiling her, so sometimes I will let her sit and cry for a little while before picking her up. She gets really angry and red in the face when I do that, so I don't let her cry for long. Is this normal? Am I spoiling her? Should I start insisting she be put down before it gets worse? I love being a SAHM, but I think maybe I am giving her too much attention (if there really is such a thing). Advice would be appreciated. Thank you and Happy Moms Day!!

Laura and Brooke 1/17/04

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Sun, 05-09-2004 - 4:58pm
I don't think there is such a thing as spoiling them at this age. Since her only way of communicating to you is by crying then she must have some need that needs to be met. I know it can become very frustrating when you feel like you have done everything for them and they still cry because they want to just be held. With my daughter I pretty much carried her everywhere with me. She hated to be alone. Now that she is two I can't get her to sit in my lap for more than a few seconds unless she is tired. I miss those days. Enjoy it while you have it. Have you thought about getting a sling or carrier? Also, I don't think it hurts them to cry for a moment expecially if you are in the middle of something and can't get to her right away. She sounds like a normal precious baby to me :) The only advice I have is hold her as much as possible because these days will pass soon enough and you will long to have them back.

Trish :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
Sun, 05-09-2004 - 7:25pm
I know how frustrating the crying can be, especially when you have things that need to get done, etc. I don't believe you can spoil a child at this age, you're the most important person in your child's life right now and being away from you can be hard for them. As the previous poster said, try the sling carrier. I personally tried it, but my babies were all big so the carrier didn't work well for me (hurt my back). The other advice is, try letting her cry for 15 minutes. (It sure can be a LONG 15 minutes, but I've found that just when I'm getting ready to pick up the little one, they fall asleep!!!) When the 15 min. is done, go back and pick her up for a bit and comfort her. If you know it's nothing that she needs, other than being held, then put her down after a bit. Talk to her while you're working around the house, or doing whatever. The sound of your voice may help to soothe her, letting her know you're still there even though you're not holding her. I agree with the previous poster about them growing up quickly. It goes by so fast. Next thing you know you'll be having "the talk" and buying tiny bras for her!! (so scary!) Enjoy your little one while she's little. Good luck! =)