need to vent...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
need to vent...
5
Wed, 10-06-2004 - 3:12am
I wish at this point there was an icon for pi**ed!!!! lol, I am sorry if I offened anyone.

Anyway, I just talked to a close friend of mine, (by the way the conversation ended, I am now thinking ex-friend..)

She said the usual "What do you DO all day???" "Don't you get bored?" bla bla bla, it went on and on and on. For some reason we started talking about the election we Canadians had a few months ago, and she said "Well I voted for (so and so) and these are my reasons why... but considering you don't work, I guess there's no reason for you to vote, so I won't even ask..."

I couldn't beleive it!!!! Because I chose to be a sahm, and make HUGE sacrifices, I no longer have a right to vote???? What the hell are people thinking??????

It just got worse from there... as some of you may know, my dh and I just bought our 1st home, but it's in a different city (about a 35 minute drive from here..not the end of the world) SHE said, "oh well, I guess it's good you bought a place in (where we are moving to), just think IF you had a job and 2 incomes, you could have afforded to live in Vancouver too!" I really could have pulled her throat out, and ate that for dinner. I am sad when old friends & I occassionaly drift apart, but this is one that I have already slammed the door on. Too bad, I have known her most of my life. Oh how people change!

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Avatar for my3girls2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: lesleymag
Wed, 10-06-2004 - 8:00am
Oh my!! I am sorry. Beleive me I am not defending her at all,, but it sounds to me as if she is jealous. She is also sad that you are leaving her area. But Boy is she D-U-M-B!!! I am sorry for her not you, you can do way better and if it were me, I would have already called her and gave her a BIG pieace of my mind. GL,
Step Aerobics
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2004
In reply to: lesleymag
Wed, 10-06-2004 - 11:29am

So sorry Lesely. Maybe she was in pain? I think though that people will show you who they really are...sometimes it is later than you expect though :(


Are you a M.O.M-Mom of Many? Find other M.O.M's

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2004
In reply to: lesleymag
Thu, 10-07-2004 - 12:48am
When people go off like that, I swear I think that they are just really going on about themselves.

For example, I had a (former) friend who did the same thing almost. She e-mailed me about how she was too busy with her career to meet, went off about how she could never in a million years stay home because it would be so dull and boring and horrible and she could just never put up with that monotony.

I was SO irritated. And then, you know, I thought, "She's a nut. She has absolute no idea about what my life is like." I figured what she really is saying was telling me (and telling herself) that she wants to be interesting and fun and cool and she is unsatisfied with her own life. It was more what she was revealing about herself than anything else.

There's no excuse for stuff like that, but it seems like salaried moms (I refuse to say 'working moms' because, boy, do I WORK too!) have a very strange view of what it means to be a full-time mom. When I quit work to be home with my baby, I had people say gems as:

* "Wow. Staying home. You'll be eating lots of chocolate and watching so much t.v.! I wish I could."

* "Yeah, my wife wanted to stay home, too. I told her she should keep working. I didn't want her to become this boring housewife."

* "Lucky. I wish I could stay home, but you know, I have to help pay the mortgage and it's not fair that I stay home and my husband has to work. I wouldn't do that to my husband."

* "I could never stay home. I have a brain."

If you can step aside of yourself for a second and just view the whole thing objectively, it's almost funny sometimes --- in a wild, black humor sort of way.

~ Maria

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
In reply to: lesleymag
Thu, 10-07-2004 - 2:17am
thank you all for responding.

I agree, and know that for the most part the others either venting thier own frustrations, or jealous (I hope!!!)

What really got me, is I am almost 30 (in a couple months) and I have known her from before my first memory. To top it off, she has 2 kids as well (she was a young mom), and was at home with them!!!! Now that they are 11 & 9 and are in full time school, she is back to work!!!! Come on!!!! Only a few years ago, she too was a sahm!!!!! The nerve!!!

Sorry, i guess i forgot to post that fact earlier, I was "miledly upset!!!!" anyway, I guess I have no choice other than to shake my head!!!!

Thanks again ladies, It's good to know I have somewhere to vent!

Lesley

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
In reply to: lesleymag
Thu, 10-07-2004 - 10:57am
i have a sister like that...... she thinks i am lazy for staying home, and that i have allthe time in the world to do what ever.......HA..... she has made our mom mad too, cuz she keeps making comments that she doenst have time to do stuff, NOW mind you... her son is 17.... definately not dependent on her anymore, and her dh does laundry, and she has a lady who cleans her house.WHAAAAAAAAAAAT..... why doesnt she have time..... she doenst coook either, cuz no one is ever home to cook for........... hmmmmm now I WONDER who is the lazy one