sahm who cant get anything done ... HELP

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2004
sahm who cant get anything done ... HELP
26
Sat, 01-03-2004 - 11:03pm
I am the proud mommy of a beautiful 5 month old baby girl and step mommy to my 3 year old boy who lives with my husband and I - I stay home with them mon- fri and work only on the weekends waiting tables. My husband is a country club manager and spends 50+ hours at work a week (depending on the time of year ) so the kids and I are alone a lot. The problem I am finding myself with is that I cannot get a thing accomplished around the house! I figured with being home all day 5 days a week my house would sparkle .... im lucky if it even looks picked up! I feel ashamed that I cant keep up with my kids and the household duties as well, but the children demand so much of my time. I am breastfeeding my daughter so that ties me up a lot, besides the fact that she is an attention lover and hates to be left to play by herself ... and my 3 year old's toys are constantly all over the house. Can anyone give me some tips on how to get more organized and get my house back in order?? Thanks!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 12:12am
Whoa! Slow down a bit! You are accomplishing alot! Your taking care of a baby and a 3 year old. Toys should be around, you have a healthy son, he plays thus toys are evident of that. Start teaching him to put toys away as he gets done with them. I made it a game with my children, before they realized it was something they had to do it became habit. You only have time with them once, when their young. Enjoy that, they grow so fast. So your house looks lived in, big deal, it should. You work outside the home too? Great energy! Just take it as it comes, slown down and enjoy your children.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 9:57am

I think you are doing a awesome job. And trust me, just cause you are home all day does not mean your house will sparkle.


You have children and with children things never stay the way you put them for more then 2 seconds....


I have a

Mel

Andrew 3-4-99

Dalton  12-4-03

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 10:54am
i'm crawling out from under the mounds of dirty laundry that are quickly engulfing my house to empathize with you, lol. personally, i can't keep this house clean. not to save my life. my ultimate goal here is survival, ie something clean for everyone to wear (even if it doesn't fit/match/look cute or even decent), have something clean to eat off of (even if it's paper!), and at least have a pathway through the toys. some weeks, like this one, when the kids are sick, dh is working alot, and i'm struggling with my little one to keep him from passing out every ten seconds, even that is too much to ask. my standards have DRASTICLY changed since my pre-kids days, as i think most parents can vouch for. really, it's a struggle for me to escape filth right now, clutter is just inevitable. but here's a few tips that i do know help. some of them are really ghetto, but i'm being honest here!

*put a big toybox in the livingroom or den or wherever you spend alot of your time. it makes cleanup faster and easier if instead of carrying everything to the playroom/bedroom you can just dump it in a toybox.

*put a trashcan in every room too, for the same reason.

*ALWAYS have paper plates available for the days when washing dishes just isn't gonna happen.

*get a really big dishdrainer. my dishes virtually never get put away in the cabinets, we just get them out of the drainer. saves maybe ten minutes a day, but it's worth it!

*set up a routine for which days you do what. monday clean the bathroom, tuesday vaccuum, wednesday mop, etc. if you only try to do one thing a day then it's a little more feasable than the pre-kids method of spending 4 hours straight cleaning. things may get a little dirty in between, but at least they'll get clean sometime!

*laundry is my real challenge, not only do i hate doing it, it's impossible to keep up with in my house, since my son is a puker and my daughter is a perfectionist that has to change her entire outfit whenever it gets the tiniest bit wet or dirty. so to prevent constantly having piles and piles of laundry sitting around waiting to be folded and put away, i don't fold my clothes. we dump them on the carpet in the livingroom and the kids help me sort them out into baskets that i've modified with cardboard so they each have three compartments, top drawer-undies, pj's and socks, middle drawer-shirts, and bottom drawer-pants. then everyone takes their basket and puts their clothes away, however crumpled and shoved they are. even my one year old can do this. it only takes 10 minutes or so to do a load, and the kids think it's fun, so that's what we do. it's a little weird, but it works.

*and finally, give up on the kids room. i have, lol. i have them pick it up every night, but i don't help them and they do a terrible job. once a week or so i go in and try to clean it out, but in the meantime i just shut the door. noone but kids goes in there, and the kids could care less, so i've given it over to the mess. it's given me back 45 mins or so of my day.

well, there's my 'tips'. o, and if you're rich enough, hire a nice french maid, and send her my way once a week or so!!

clarity

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 2:30pm
Hi congrats on your baby . I am the mom of 4 girls ages 4, 2, 2 ,8 months i manage to keep my house semi-clean but it sure the heck dosnt sparkle breast feeding is hard work i nursed all mine too i had a front carrier which could be used for nursing too that way i could walk around and get a little done while dd ate it really worked wonders . also how bout letting the older one help clean i have a mini broom and vaccumm for my girls so when i clean so do they well i hope i helped good luck to ya
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 2:57pm

Good suggestions :)


I was not looking for any, but sure sounded good, even for me, who thought I knew everything

Mel

Andrew 3-4-99

Dalton  12-4-03

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Sun, 01-04-2004 - 6:52pm
Its hard to raise little ones and have a clean house! Just remember they are not going to remember how clean your house was they'll remember that you were a great mom who played with them!

Good Luck,

Shelby

p.s. If you can get some help, after our daughter was born my husband and I hired a cleaning lady! Maybe you can get your friends family to watch the little ones for a few hours so that way you can get some cleaning done.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 12:25pm
I was like you when I quiet my job to stay home with my 1st baby I thought my house should sparkle too since i'm home not working, and no matter how hard I tried it never sparkled. What you need is a new point of view, I read post once that said

"you can eat off my floors........

....There is enough crumbs down there to feed an army LOL!!!!

And that my point of view, I have 3 kids I rather be in the back yard pushing them on the swing then mopping my floors, so if the house doesn't spark is fine with me as long as the kids had a good time with me that day. Of course I like my house to look nice so some tricks I do to keep the house looking some what nice is...

I wake before the kids and do the dishes, sweep & SWIFER the floors (buy a wet swifer it's a life saver, no mop, no bucket, no dumping water) Then when my 5 yr old off to school and my 2 youngest take a nap or busy playing, I do ONE chore a day

Monday-clean bathrooms

Tuesday-Vaccum

Wednesday-change beds

thursday-dust & starighten house up

Friday-wash clothes

Weekends is my off day, no work LOL

And a great way to keep those toys off the floor and out from under foot, We turn our guest bedroom into a playroom!! We move the guest bed out and put all toys in the bedroom, with child's table & chairs, 3 toy boxes and 2 shelf units. My 5 yr old & 2 yr old understand the toys STAY in the playroom they can toss toys all over the floor or put in the toy boxes or make a mees I don't care (it's their room) when company comes over I just close the door and the rest of the house is TOY FREE.

I know some would say just put the toys in their bedrooms and do the same thing. The problem is the BED take up a lot of room kids like to spread their toys out!! By having a big room (no bed)to put toys everywhere they are happy and don't car to bring the toys into the family room.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2003
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 12:29pm
LMBO!!! I love that saying "you can eat off my floor"!! That should be my motto! Seems like I am constantly sweeping my kitchen floor, just to turn around and find SOMETHING on the floor!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 12:34pm
My husband and I have 7 sons, 3 were his, 3 were mine and we have 1 together. I totally get your frustration. People come over and you wonder if theyre thinking "shes home all day, whats with the toys everywhere". Our first 6 are all school aged. Then I have a toddler. What helps me is I let him play with all the toys he wants to (in one room)and when 3 o'clock rolls around he and I clean them up and I run a vacuum over the floor. Funny how those stripes make it looks so much cleaner. He helps me and now it has become a game. Takes about 10 minutes tops. The biggest mistake I made in the past was letting my toddler aged kids play in every room of the house. For me, One room was the trick. Good luck to you...Love to chat sometime!! , Paula Holley
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 12:43pm

I felt the same you as you for a while. It can be overwhelming to keep things clean and take care of two kids. The problem is, there are people LIVING in the house ALL day now. It's much harder to keep clean.


I have 3 kids, 8,5 and almost 3. I was taking care of a 9 month old but am not anymore so have more time. I try to keep the kitchen "picked up" and I do laundry each day...just one load, I hate laundry and the thought of doing a big pile on one day doesnt go over well. As far as the kitchen, if the kitchen is a wreck, for some reason so is the rest of the house, it just snowballs. If dishes arent done they multiply and then I have to wash pans before i cook whatever meal I am trying to prepare. It just really helps me to keep ontop of the kitchen.


One time that worked for me, if preparing a meal, as soon as you start the meal, fill your sink with hot sudsy water. That way once your done with preparing you can throw the pots,pans, spatulas etc. in there, they can soak a bit and then wash them right then and there. I find its easier to just wash the disheswe use to eat off

Lilypie Baby Days]

 

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