Seperation?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Seperation?
5
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 3:53pm

I need some advice on my toddler son's seperation anxiety. He is 18 months old and totally freaks out whenever I leave him. I've tried to "coach" him before dropping him off in the church day care (just sunday mornings) and I've recently started carring him with me to the gym nursery while I work out. He cries the whole entire time! He's not one of those kids that cries for 10 minutes and then plays. I've tried everything, from explaning it to him that mama will be back and to play with other kids, to the dreaded sneaking out. Please Help!! He's been like this seems like forever, he's been going to the same church nursery since December.

When I finish working out and pick him up, he wants to get down and play with the other kids, it's like as long as he can see me he is fine.

I've been a SAHM since his birth and he is our only child. Do you think giving him a picture of me to keep with him would work?? Thanks alot!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2004
In reply to: younglassie
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 5:28pm
my oldest had this problem...what i ended up having to do was take him to someone(daycare or a person to babysit) tell him mommy was leaving and she would be back...give him a kiss and just leave....then i would come back in 15 mins...the second time i would wait 20 mins...the 3rd time 30 mins...just to show him that mommy would be back...within a week , maybe 2, it cured him....he did have his moments from time to time, but i did this with all my kids and he was the only one who had the seperation anxiety....big huge hugs to you and i hope that some of this might help or maybe someone else can give you better advice
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
In reply to: younglassie
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 5:47pm
I have not been through this with any of my kids, so I do not have advice.
I hope it gets better for you soon.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2005
In reply to: younglassie
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 8:42pm

I have heard that you can give them something to carry in their pocket from you that may help with the separation anxiety.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2006
In reply to: younglassie
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 11:36pm
My son was the same way. It has nothing to do with what you have or haven't done, some kids just need extra tlc and assurance. It is hard to go through this stage but it doesn't last forever(even though you think it may!) I always told my son I love you and mommy's going to work and I will be back soon. My husband would let him get the door when I came home and he quickly quit throwing fits. He had more control over the problem and his feelings and it helped. It soon just became a routine when I left and came home. He is the type that loves routine and has problems when we stray.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
In reply to: younglassie
Fri, 08-04-2006 - 10:04am
If you want to try a picture, it wouldn't hurt. Honestly the more you do it, the more familiar he'll get with the routine and it will be easier. Remember not to drag out the goodbye either... just a quick hug & kiss, "I love you, mommy will be back soon!", then out the door.
I hope it gets easier for you both! hang in there :o)


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