Should I go back to work?

Avatar for hellokris2
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2003
Should I go back to work?
6
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 3:26pm
I am a teacher and a mother of a nine year old and a six month old. I have been off of work since the baby was born. I am scheduled to go back to work in January part time. THis means that I will work every other day not including the weekends.

The problem is that I don't want to go back to work. I will miss my baby and plus I have been a better mom to my 9 year old since I have been home. I have so much more time and energy. We have been surviving on my husband's salary since I have been not working but just barely. My husband works extremely long hours so I do all the house work and child rearing.

I asked my husband if I could stay home until August of next year but he said he would prefer me to go back to work in January. If I insisted on staying home he would accept that but he might be more stressed and unhappy. I devised a budget that would work for me to stay home but again we would just be skimping by. THe other dilemna is that I don't particuarly like my job. I have been thinking about going back to school and pursuing another career. Of course there is another side of me that likes my job because of the hours and long breaks I get to be with my kids. If I leave my job now I may not get it back. That is a little scary.

My questions are:

Should I risk it all to stay with my kids? Is having no money worth being with my kids for? Is going back to work worth the stress? SHould i relieve my husband of the burden of being sole provider? SHould I risk my career my leaving now? Should I leave now so that I can pursue another career?



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 3:41pm
my theory is kids comes first.......if you can make it til the baby starts school, then everyone will be better for it..... my dh has been the sole provider for our household for 24 years...... my youngest is 7.. believe me....... it has NOT been easy........ we have lived penny for penny for many years.. and are just now getting ahead.... but it was worth every second, to get to see all the kids first.and be able to enjoy the lives of my kids before they are grown. it is actualy as important to be home after the kids are in school, as it was before.but being a teacher, you have more flexibility to be off work when your kids are home....... but you still miss all the school functions and stuff. then there is still that darn house work and dinner......... just makes for a more stressful life in my opinion
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 5:02pm
How about looking into tutoring? I know several teachers who tutor on the side and they make big money. You can also check out places like Sullivan tutoring and work there. There are many opportunities for teachers.

Or, how about working nights and weekends at a retail establishment? Then your hubby can watch the kids (no daycare) and you can bring in a little money.

There are ALWAYS ways to bring in money without putting your children in daycare. You just have to be creative!

Ejkdmom Come visit my store: www.leorra.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 8:12pm
I think this is a choice you both should make.
Sometimes life does not allow us to stay home with our kids and sometimes it does.
I hope you can do what would make you both happy.
Good luck.


Lilypie Baby Days



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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 9:21am
This is just my opinion and I hope no one bashes me here, but if I were you, I would try to go back to work and see what happens. Working part time and having weekends and summers off sounds like it would work for you and your kids, plus it sounds like your DH would be happy with that, too. If things don't work out, you can give your notice at the end of the year-at least you won't be wondering if you should have gone back. Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2004
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 1:31pm

To me it sounds as if you have made up your mind what you really want to do. The question seems to how to stay home and still bring in an income.


Would you be willing to teach pre-schoolers to read? Maybe put up a flyers and you could make your own hours...I did this last year a few days a week, and it worked out great. You could also substitute at day care's and preschools, then take your little one with you. Day care's are always looking for qualified people to substitute. YMCA's and other exercise places look for good people as well, and this is another place you could take your little one and still be there for your 9 year old.


As a homeschooling parent I am always looking for good websites to print off ready made report cards and worksheets. If you are crafty with the computer this could be a big business.


You could also tutor like one of the above posts suggested.


Good luck I hope you find a way to stay home like you want!








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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 2:23pm
hi, re: going back to your teaching job or not:

do you go back & forth & sometimes you miss it or do you really not want to do it?

this is a tough dilemma & i have one new idea to add for how you may improve your situation.

it sounds like you don't want to go back to working (for now).

& few jobs will be over when school day is over- so if not this job- then, probably not any job is what you want for now. if you DH works loooong hours & is stressed then he probably is not up to handling all kid & house stuff all weekend while you work in retail or have kids to the house at night for tutoring.

that is a dilemma!

if working 2-3 days a week is more than you want- then, you probably don't want to go find a weekend job either. (that is the time when the whole family is together).

perhaps find a non-traditional job where you can have more flexibility.

like tutoring or working retail on weekends.

if you don't have it in you to work & parent & keep up your household, that's understandable.

maybe you can help your husband to relate that not all moms are up to working & parenting & managing their houses also.

some are & some are not.

OK: so my idea....

Can you cut your living expenses?

Maybe even buy a cheaper house & pocket the profit to live off of for a few years?

(someone once raised that point to me & although there are some charges in selling a house & buying a new one- you still may come out w/ a large nest egg- perhaps moving outside of town?)



 Katrina