Sleep Over question

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sleep Over question
6
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 1:52pm

At what age do you guys think it's OK for kids to start sleeping over at each others' houses? Matthew was invited to sleep over at his buddy's house tonight. He just turned 8, and is in 3rd grade. We know the parents--they live in our development and I play BUNCO with the mom. Their son is in Matthew's class this year. The mom has been commiserating with me on the phone about Matthew's teacher.

I was very hesitant to let him go. He's only had sleep overs at his cousins' houses before, never friends. He goes to friends' houses a lot, but has never spent the night. He begged me to let him go, and then my DH said I needed to "Cut the cord" and that he was old enough!! So I gave in. But I'm wondering if he isn't still too young. Am I just being overprotective (Michael thinks so)? This is his first time, and maybe it's Mommy Anxiety.

At what age did your kids start having sleep overs, or if they're not old enough yet, at what age did you? Or at what age will you let them?

I wouldn't even consider it if I didn't know the parents!!

So he's leaving me tonight for his friends' house. Such a big boy! I'm feeling a bit emotional, LOL!

Sofia




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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2003
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 2:15pm
I think I first slept over at someone's house when I was 6 or 7. But that was the 80s when people were a litte more trusting (and trustworthy). If you know the family, and you like them, and they're close enough for him to come home if it doesn't work out halfway through, then my vote would be to let him do it. :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 2:26pm

I agree with Michael - he is old enough. Katie started sleepovers last year, and she was in 3rd grade. I think it is o.k., especially because you know the mom and he will be right in your subdivision. There is only one girl in Katie's class we don't allow her to go to her house, let alone sleepover. It is because of her attitude and we don't know her parents AT ALL - they don't even make an effort to get to know any of us at any functions. Also, they own a horse farm, and I will not allow Katie over there. I don't trust her mom (even tho her dad is a dr. - I'm still nervous). DH just thinks the little girl is a brat. LOL. So, anyway, you just have to gauge it by how well you know the parents, and how you think your son will be in that situation. I guess, just be prepared to have to go get him, if you have to. Otherwise, I hope he has a great time. Sleepovers are so much fun!!

Hugs to you Sofia - I know that letting them grow up isn't easy!!

Wendy

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Registered: 10-06-2006
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 3:33pm
I don't think that age should be the concern...I think how well you know the family is one of the main concerns...the other, and it is ashame that it even has to be brought up, but in today's world, how well has he been taught about proper and improper contact with other people towards him.....if he knows well, then I would say he is ready. It's just my opinion of course....maybe I am over-cautious, but we don't want to be too naive(and it does NOT sound like you are at all), b/c then our children become vulnerable.
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Registered: 11-13-2003
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 1:41pm

Sofia, I think if you are comftorable with the family, then go for it. Seeing as how close they live to you, thats another bonus, because if he cant sleep or gets home sick in the middle of the night, its not a big deal to go out and get him kwim?


my sister and I had MANY sleepovers when we were that age and younger, but it was the 80's and there weren't so many scary stories out there kwim? another idea, if you are not 100% happy about him sleeping away from home, maybe the boy can sleepover at your house first, so you can ease yourself into the idea. just a thought lol. good luck, let me know how it goes!

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 11:44pm

Thanks everyone for your input!

He did do the sleep over thing, and we did *not* get called in the night to go get him, LOL! And the mom said he was a perfect gem the whole time (now why can't he be like that at home??). He had a good time and it all went well. I guess it's our turn to have this little boy over to our house for the night now.

The sleep overs begin. . .

Sofia




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Registered: 03-17-2005
Mon, 10-09-2006 - 1:05pm
I'm glad it went well.

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