Surgery with small kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Surgery with small kids
9
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 10:10pm
I have a 3 month old and a 6 year old, and am a stay at home mom. I have had two previous back surgeries (I have a birth defect which causes my disks to herniate, which is then painful, they have gone in and put titanium plates, rods and skrews) I now have a pinched sciatic nerve from herniated disks in my back. This is causing extreame pain! My Dr put me on Oxicotin theis week, which frankly scares me and makes it hard to function at a level I need to take care of my kids. However, I can barely walk with out the strong med. It is terribly painful even on the drugs. The Dr also wants to do another surgery. When you have back surgery you can't bend, lift, move around much at all for awhile. My husband works full time as a resteraunt manager, and I don't have any family or friends that can take weeks off work to come and help me take care of the kids so I could recover from the surgery. We don't have the money to pay anyone to help that much either. I can't live in this extreame pain or on this much pain medicine for very long, and I am doing damage to my back the longer I put off surgery. But how can I have surgery with no one to help with the kids?
Has anyone else had to go through this kind of thing? Any ideas, advice or thoughts? I appreciate anything! Thanks liztk
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 3:00am

I wish I could help...I'd be there in a heart beat to help you....You live in Cali??? Are you parents nearby or can either one help...in-laws? I don't know if they have it where you live but here in Cali they have the family Medical leave act that your DH could get to be able to stay home to help you?

Good luck.

Jenn

Lilypie Baby Ticker

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2005
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 8:36am
What about a church?

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 1:34pm
You are sweet, thanks. I live in Pennsylvania, and my family all works, so none of them can help. I am going to have my husband look into the family leave with his job. THis is all so nerve wracking and over-whelming. My infant was just diagnosed wiht a protein allergy, so he has to be on this expensive synthetic formula made in Europe. It is going to cost us around $200 a WEEK! Something we definatly didn't budget for. We are appealing ot our insurance company, but I don't have much hope there, it has been a rough week! Thanks for your response! Liz
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 2:34pm

If your state has the paid family medical leave act, you parents and in-laws can take it as well to care for a family member. Here oin Cali you get the same amount of pay as disability/unemployment for up to 6 weeks so if you family was willing to do a week each they would just get a little less than their reg. pay check...I so hope it works out....Have youtried doing a search on line for the formula to see if there is anywhere else you can get it cheaper? I usually google the name of thngs and you never know...

Prayers to you and your family.

Jenn

Lilypie Baby Ticker

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 4:33pm
You can get the formula cheaper (sometimes) by bidding on EBAY, I am a little nervous about someone selling "fake" formula, becasue it is so major. The pediatrician just called me and said that there is still blood in his stool indicating that the neocate may not be working, and that the only alternative is "a lot" more expensive than that! I wasn't brave enough ot ask how much more than $200 a week it is. I have to take in a fresh stool Tuesday for more tests, UGH! I am going ot search for the family leave act now, thanks for the tip! Liz
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 8:21pm

There are sometimes scholarships and grants for child care through the city or state treasurer. Also for the family leave act here in Ohio - I dont know about Penn. We have to use up all our sick days and vacation days first plus there is a week of no money in between those days before the disability pay comes in. So be prepared for that week or longer so you dont stretch your finances too thin.

You can look into your mortgage company and see what they offer in assistance so you have a little extra money for the formula and sitter help.

At least come April you can deduct the formula on your taxes. I hope that helps you look up in this hard time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 9:21pm

Yeah deffinatley not worth your childs well being to bid on e-bay...I know I wouldn't...Can the ped help at all with say samples or anything? Dosen't hurt to ask....I know when I didn't have allot of money and needed a medicine soemtimes my Dr. would give the dose I needed in samples....Or writing to the formula company and seeing of you can get a discount or coupons? I'm sure they have a dot com.....

Jenn

Lilypie Baby Ticker

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2003
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 1:45pm

Hi I was just reading about your problem, have you looked in to WIC?

 

Shari mother to

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 9:28pm
The pediatrician has given us all the samples they have and is writing a letter to our insurance company to try to get them to help. They are also contacting the makers of the formula to see if they can assist. Hopefully something will come through soon! Thanks for everybodys kind thoughts and advice! Liz