For teachers who are also parents (m)
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|Tue, 09-07-2004 - 1:53pm|
Am I wondering how those of you who have taught pre and post your own children feel your teaching has changed as a result of being a parent.
If I am honest with myself - I have changed, and some of it is probably positive and some of it is negative.
More empathy for kid emotions than I used to have. (We moved this summer and dd was starting a new school this fall. You can bet I noticed those scared expressions on new kids at my school way more than normal this year, in fact, I almost got teary eyed bringing one to her room!
Higher standards - I have seen how easily my daughter learned things, and expect to see it at school.
More realization of how school requirements effect homelife/family time.
Willing to spend way less time on career. Don't get me wrong, I still try to do my very best job while there, and my principal and colleages would say I do a good job, I am sure. But little things - like being at every outside of school time event, spending hours searching for the perfect example to illustate a concept instead of settling for an ok example or the lesson in the book, or willingness to stay after school for extra curricular events instead of going home to pick up my own child - - definitely I am more selfish with my time now.
Some history on me so it makes sense where I am coming from. I taught 10 years, then was a sahm during her preschool years, and did not go back to teaching full time until she was in 1st grade. She is now in 3rd grade, and I still feel like I struggle greatly with balance. When I am being a great teacher, I am being a bad mom. When I take to time to be the best mom I want to be, I have to settle for good enough teacher sometimes. And then I feel guilty about that.
I always thought teaching was a good career to balance with momhood. And in some ways, it is. Having similar hours, summers, etc. is a good match. But the lack of flexibility (no days off when I want them to go to her school for a program, or conference, or when she is going to be presented with an award, or to be a mom at the school party. Lots of other jobs allow you to take an hour off and go back, go in later, stay earlier, etc. But in teaching, it's half day sub and use a very limited personal day)
And the amount of work you have to do to get READY to go to work!!!
My husband makes nearly double what I do and almost never comes home with work for evenings or weekends. He works at work, and has home time at home.
I've come to the conclusion that the demands of the job really are unreasonable. I wonder if only those who are childless, or with grown children can really devote the time that should be devoted. And, even for those people, it is not a fair expectation either. They should have a life seperate from career too. Or, am I just teaching in an overly demanding school district, perhaps?
Am I the only one who struggles with trying to balance teaching with motherhood.
Would love to hear from other moms and how they handle the balance without guilt on either side. One of those hard to discuss in real life kinds of things - don't really want to admit at school that I don't always think I am doing the very best job I could, kwim?
Thanks in advance. And to anyone that the topic bothers, please feel free to ignore.
(Who is home with too much time to be philosophical and think today after going to the doctor this morning and being put on steroids for a huge allergic reaction today. Wondering about how the poor substitute is doing today with kids that *I* have only seen 1 hour so far this year, and was not even done with teaching routines etc. Definitely NOT a good time to be out.)
Edited 9/7/2004 6:33 pm ET ET by merimom96