So this is what happened today

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Registered: 03-26-2003
So this is what happened today
8
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 12:05pm

I got a call from the "behavior specialist" at Joey's school and she said I needed to come in for a meeting because there had been some "inappropriate touching". (Remember the whole back scratching incident?) My stomach dropped immediately. I thought Joey had been touching one of the girls or something. Turns out a little boy (one who came to Joey's party) touched Joey's privates in the bathroom. I didn't know what to think at first. You know my first initial thought was "why is your kid touching my kid??". I was angry at first. I can't EVER see Joey doing that to another kid. But you never know, I guess.

I had to meet with his teacher, the two behavior specialists, the vice principal and the other parents. The other little boy was apparently molested back in October by the babysitter's 14 year old son. :( He is now in counseling. The parents looked completely shaken and had already made a call to have an emergency visit with the counselor. My heart broke for these poor people. I got all teary-eyed and Joey's teacher said "please don't start" and grabbed the box of kleenex. lol *sigh*

I am sad for the other kid. It's terrible but the other part of me is like WHY did it have to be MY kid??!! Ya know. Honestly, I don't think it's THAT big of a deal for Joey. For the other kid, yes. I think that since they are both 6 years old and it's a normal age to be curious, it's not like I'd really say Joey got molested or anything.

Joey stayed at school, the other boy went home. I had a talk with Joey before I left. I told him he was very right by going to tell the teacher. That he didn't do anything wrong and it's not his fault at all. That he's not in trouble. That he doesn't need to tell everyone about this. That it's private. And that he knows that he should NEVER touch anyone else like this. Then I told him again about good touching and bad touching.

I told my mom about it and she doesn't think I should make a huge deal out of it that I should ask him when he gets home if he wants to talk about it and if he doesn't to just let it go.

That's basically what the specialists said at school.

What do you ladies think? Anyone have any experience with this in this age group?

I can't see this being a thing that Joey would go and repeat.




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Registered: 09-19-2005
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 1:42pm

I can't imagine how scared you were when you got the call.

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Registered: 05-11-1999
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 3:22pm
Ditto to Kelley's post.
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Avatar for beanersmom
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-01-2009 - 11:22am

Thanks Kelley and Christol for responding. I thought a post like this would warrant a tad more support. I came on here confused because I wasn't sure I was doing the right thing. I guess it wasn't THAT big of a deal afterall.




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Registered: 12-16-1998
Mon, 06-01-2009 - 11:43am

I'm sorry you are feeling unsupported Carmen.


I guess I should have posted Hugs at least.


I'm so doubting my own ability to even be a functioning human being at the moment I really didn't feel I had any advice worth sharing.


((((SORRY))))

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Registered: 07-06-2001
Mon, 06-01-2009 - 1:31pm

Carmen,

I'm sorry that I didn't respond, it was a crazy week around here last week. I'm even more sorry that this happened to Joey (and you) but it sounds like the school is handling it very well. I think you are taking the right approach to not make a huge deal out of it other than to reinforce that he definitely did the right thing to tell. It is so sad that this other boy has already gone through something like this and I hope they get him the help he needs. How has Joey been the last few days?

Hugs to you both and again I'm really sorry that I didn't respond earlier.

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Registered: 04-15-2004
Wed, 06-03-2009 - 1:22pm

Oh Carmen, I don't even know where to begin.

Rock Stars
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Wed, 06-03-2009 - 3:27pm

Carmen, I'm sorry you're not feeling supported.


siggy-1.jpg picture by 1_luckymommy

Avatar for beanersmom
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 10:03pm

Thanks ladies. I didn't mean to be so dramatic. lol I just wasn't sure that I reacted the right way. Joey seems to be doing just fine. We had one more brief talk about it that night and then last night again because he and Rhiannon went over to play with a girl in his class and her sister. I just reminded him that he has to keep his hands to himself. I felt that I should reinforce this about this little girl because Joey LIKES her. lol I didn't want him getting too touchy, feely with her and it turn into something bad. Ya know?

Christine, it is standard procedure in any situation like this for all of the staff to be present. They want to make sure everyone knows they take this kind of thing very seriously.




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