Dont know what to do - Im only 16!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Dont know what to do - Im only 16!!
10
Mon, 11-03-2003 - 1:09am
Hi. How ya doin. Well like I said Im only 16 and lately my bf and i have been having unprotected sex (I was on the pill for a while but it made me really sick). I have what I think would be described as tugging/pulling feelings - but im not sure if its right... Also back aches, dizziness, and fatigue. My cousin told me she had about the same symptoms when she was pregnant and told me to find some information online. I dont want to go to my parents yet because I dont want to worry them. They know Im having sex but if its only a false alarm it would be easier on my conscience to keep quiet. If you have any advice or can help me find out if im pg or not that would be wonderful. My pd isnt due for a few more days but i did have the smallest (almost unnoticable) amount of spotting yesterday. Thanks!

Anyamarie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Mon, 11-03-2003 - 3:20am
Its good to hear that your open with your parents, wish things were that way for me back then...but on with your subject, them can be pregnancy signs, and others to look for is sore nipples or bb's, and of course being sick to your stomach. I would wait a few more days and see if your period shows, if it don't, then I would get a pregnancy test and see what it says. Of course if you still don't want to worry your parents, you or your bf can buy the test and you can take it before talking to them. You sound like your pretty smart, but if this is a false alarm...and hopefully it is, I would recamend finding another form of birth control. There are a lot of options out there besides the pill. The pill used to make me sick too, so I know where your coming from on that, its hard to take something everyday when you know thats why you feel so ill. Some of the most common is the Depo shot, or another good option is the Nueva Ring, I used it for a short bit and seemed pretty decent. Good Luck to you, and come back to let us know whats going on with you. The only way to know is to test when your late....
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2003
Mon, 11-03-2003 - 9:05am
Hey! I just wanted to say that I agree with the last message, but also, is your BF wearing a condom? Don't take no for an answer-I did, and I was PG when I was 16 (this was only a few years ago, I'm 23 now). My BF then was understanding when I miscarried, but after that, he still refused to wear a condom (I was not able to talk to my parents about it). So-I got PG again. Anyway, the story ends up happy (but not w/the BF-he took off after some differences in opinion-mainly he wanted me to save his rear end and take all the blame), because I have a smart 5 year old boy, am married to a sweet guy and have another little one with him, but there are a lot of things I didn't get to do and am having to wait to do. College is pretty much out of the question until all the kids are in school, etc (you've probably heard it all before). Anyway-if you do end up PG, we're all here for you, and you CAN get through it and become a stronger person for it. If you are not PG, please take this as a warning-no birth control is completely fail-safe. Condoms break, pills get missed, etc, but you can take as much precaution as possible and hopefully prevent a pregnancy until you are ready. I'm not saying that I don't like where I am (a 23 year old married gal, etc.), I do, but there are some experiences I will never have (living in a dorm, doing the *college* scene, having a few child-free years).
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Mon, 11-03-2003 - 11:13am
Well I would wait until you have missed your period because it could also be a hormone inbalance. Let me know how it goes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Mon, 11-03-2003 - 6:27pm
hmm yes i thought it was just a hormonal imbalance too... but the symptoms have lasted over a week now and thats very unusual for me. all the dates add up a little too perfectly - i can test tomorrow morning... just have to convince my mom to let me borrow $10 lol!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 4:41pm
I am 25 I had a child at 20 I also got sick taking the pill and never tried another source of bc, my bf at the time would not use a condom I had asked him to but he make up excuses I never really pushed it ,I guess becuase I was with him since I was 17 he was 24 (17 and stupid) anywase I ended up getting pregnant and now have a wonderful 5 yr old who I wouldnt change for the world my bf at the time cheated on me with one of my friends and left on our sons first b day I recently goy married to a wonderful man who loves me and my son.We now are trying to get pregnant and I actually have similar symptoms to what you are having I agree with the others wait it out to see if you af is late if it is get a hpt and if you get your AF I would recommened the patch I tried it and it did not make me feel sick and it is easy you dont have to remember to take it every day good luck to you hope everything works out for the best let us know how things work out for you

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 5:48pm
I too got pregnant at an early age. I was 19.....and lost the baby. I too had problems with the pill but finally found one that worked with my body. I was on the pill for 11 years -- being pregnant at 19 scared the witts out of me -- and now at 31 my DH and I are TTC #1. Unfortunately, your symptoms could mean lots of things but they do sound like pg symptoms. The only true way to know is doing a pg test. Hopefully you are not pg and can go on being a 16 year old. If you are pg, you CAN and WILL make it through it....Good luck and let us know what happens. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

Christine

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 6:52pm
Hey! I just wanted to say that I am young, 19, I have been married for 14 months but I don't have any children. I had a friend who went through the same thing when she was about 16, except she was actually late. She kept stessing out abut it because she didn't want to talk with her parents, which I believe was the reason for her being late. After she told her parents, all the stress was gone and she started the next day. So my advice to you, would be to not stress out until you are officially late. Also, you don't have to talk you mom into giving you money. I would suggest going to a planned parenthood or a crisis pg center. Most of them give free pg tests and offer you someone to talk to when you get the results one way or the other, and they are confidential. Also, if you parents know that you are sexually active I would suggest you talk to your doctor about finding a bc method that is right for you. If you need anyone to talk to please feel free to email me at MissNykea@aol.com. Sometimes it can be easier to talk to a stranger than someone you know. Please let us know how everything turns out!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 9:26pm
I hope that things work out for well for you. There are a few thoughts I have as well that, surprisingly have not been mentioned by the other ladies -

At this stage in your life there is NO WAY you should be using a birth control method that does not protect you from STD's - I'm not sure how anyone can even reccomend it. It's just too scary out there with all the diseases, etc.

I, too, was sexually active at a young age, (which I regret now) but was at least sure to use condoms. Not sure why any "boyfriend" would talk you out of that. It's 100% selfish, and I'm sure this type of guy would be most likely to walk, or run, away from you if you turn out to be pregnant.

Although some methods of birth control are certainly pretty safe, any sex should be considered potenially "unsafe" as all methods have a failure rate - if you are not emotionally, financially or otherwise ready to care for a child, you should spend some time rethinking your current forms, or lack of, birth control. At 16, you're intelligent enough to realize that it is not fair to the unborn child.

I know this is harsh, but, you're just so young, and I think a lot of the advice you've been given is not really in your best interest.

Denise

Denise

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 10:57pm
Well you could stop having sex. Chances are you won't get pregnant that way . . .
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 11:34pm
I hope things go well tomorrow, let us know....I'm sending negative vibes your way!! LOL thats weird to say, but its what I hope you get. Good Luck

Emily