hurting...
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hurting...
| Sat, 10-18-2003 - 3:36am |
I have a lot of symptoms of being pregnant but so far no positive test (I'm taking a second one tomorrow)...the thing is, I left everyone I knew and loved to be with my husband, now that we are married, he doesn't treat me as well. He doesn't treat me badly, phsyically but emotionally things have been rough. Maybe because I am more sensitive because of hormonal changes, I don't know. But what gets me is that if I am not pregnant, I don't know how I will go on. This possible baby is all I have left that I feel loves me no matter what, it is what I have to plan for and take care of to the best of my ability and if all that is taken away, I don't know how I will cope. Just the thought of it hurts like crazy. I want this baby more then anything just because I want someone who loves me and who I can pour myself into, to do everything possible to make sure they have the best of everything. I don't know if any of this makes sense, maybe I just need to vent anyways but if you have any advice or have/had the same feelings please respond.

when are the dates of LMP and when did you "o"?
do you think your husband will be happy about having a baby?
You are very young....and having a baby at your age is going to be hard on you if you are PG....but he's not going to make it any easier if he's already suggesting that you "get rid of it"....i don't like when guys try to force decisions on you especially about the life of a child....
i know you're scared no doubt...i'm sacred myself....but i know you may feel even lonlier because you don't think you have anyone to turn to....i can make a suggestion....only a suggestion now....how about going to your family and seeing if you can get the support that you need....do you think they would take you under their wings despite you turning your back (in your eyes) on them....you need someone on your side right now....and unfortunately, it's not your husband....
about marrying too young...i won't comment on that because we all have our personal opinions....maybe you just didn't know him as well as you thought that's all....
keep me posted though...i want to make sure you're at least doing ok...
****big hug*****
Oh my goodness you have a heavy load. I found myself in a very similar situation. My husband and I were having problems. We had a 3 year old and we ended up pg w/ our second.I was sooooo happy to be pg again. It gave me something to hold onto . I was distracting myself from the real issues in my marriage and my life. I lost that baby at 8 weeks. I was beside myself. The loss was terrible and I was broken from it. I had used the baby as a substitute for the love I should have been getting from my husband. That baby was everything to me. In retrospect, that is a lot of responsibility to put on someone that wasn't even born yet-to be the fix for all of my problems, to be the one that I could give everything to. I used that baby to ignore all of my problems(lonliness, sadness)
My husband and I ended up divorcing-when I had to look at the state of our marriage and the fact that he wasn't willing to devote himself to it, me or our son, I left. I am much happier now and remarried to a wonderful man who loves me without question and is good to me and his stepson. My point is this:don't distract your self from what the real issues are. If your marriage is strained please do not bring a baby into it-solve your problems first and decide if you are going to stay together.
I will say prayers for you-I have been there.
Laura
You are married to a jerk(in my opinion)> How can you respect someone that would ask you to get rid of your baby? If you are indeed pregnant, that is a blessing. He is asking you to kill your blessing? You did not pick the right man. You picked a boy-a selfish one at that.
Please go home to your parents. They love you and know you made a mistake and will take you back. They want you to be allright and you won't be if this is how he is treating you. How old is he? Please , if you cannot talk to your parents, please find a minister,priest,rabbi and explain the situation. They will help you.
Laura
Things have been going a lot better with my husband, I've gotten him to talk to me more about the problems in our marriage and we have been working on them together. The second test was again negative but they said to call again and get another test if I haven't had my period within the week. Its the middle of the week and there is no sign of my period. Most of my symptoms have subsided as well except for the very sore breasts and nausea. I've been thinking back though and trying to get my days in chronological order and I remembered I didn't have my period last month either...wouldn't the HGB's have to show up in more then a month and a half?? I haven't missed a period since years ago and I have never missed more then one month. Its very confusing, but I don't really think I am pregnant anymore. With that much time having gone by and it not showing up on the tests.
My husband and I haven't talked that much about it anymore, it is a touchy issue. I don't want to upset him so I have tried to avoid it. I know we need to talk about it even if there is no way I am pregnant, just in case it happens later.
Emily
EDD 6-20-03