No Positive HPT's, waiting for Dr's call
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| Mon, 10-27-2003 - 8:27am |
First off, let me explain that I wasn't trying to get pregnant yet. Truly, I guess that's where my confusion comes from. I've been on the Pill since this Spring, but switched pills three months ago due to moodiness from the first pill I was on. Did not miss one this month; as a matter of fact, the only one I missed was last month, the Second Sunday of the month. And I doubled up the very next morning.
BUT, here it is Monday, and I should have gotten my period last week. I took two HPT's and both were BFN. Where's AF?? I called the OB/GYN Friday morning, and first the nurse said, "I'm sure you're fine, don't worry about it". HELLO? What if I AM pg, and those were false negatives? I didn't want to start my next pill pack if I am pg. She agreed to send me for a blood test, so I'll find out later this morning for sure what the outcome is, but I haven't been able to get it out of my head since last Wednesday.
I guess I just don't know what to say/think/do because I don't know. I HATE not knowing. With both my other two pg's I knew I was pg before I'd even missed one AF, but with this one, the only symptom I've got (and I'm not even sure it's a symptom...) is that I feel like I've got a LOT of CM. It's to the point where I feel like I need to run to the bathroom because I think AF's here because I feel so wet.
DH hasn't said much, other than, "if you're pg, then you are; if not, then you're not". He doesn't want me to stress about it, until we know for sure one way or the other. I just keep thinking that I've got to be, because what else would cause me to miss AF? I wonder if he's secretly happy about it. The thing is, DH & I were planning to have a 3rd baby, but not just yet. Our first two are less than 2 yrs apart, which is really tough for me (and to think, I'd planned it that way!). Right now, the older DD is 3yrs old, and the younger DD is almost 18mos. Having a third right now would put this baby almost two years younger than DD#2. Three kids four years old and under. I had planned to TTC around this time next year so that the baby would be about three years younger than DD#2.
SO, it wouldn't be the worst thing on this earth if that blood test comes back positive, because I want another one, but it'll take some getting used to, because it's so unexpected.
Thank you for letting me ramble......I need to get this out, but don't want to tell everyone that I *MAY* be pg. I'd honestly like to not tell anyone, except my twin, for a while even if I am pg.......I think I want to keep it to ourselves for a little while.
Phyllis (26, 27 in just over a week!!)
DH Gordon (41), Grace 7/23/00, & Dianna 5/19/02
