Stressing (probably over nothing)--long
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| Fri, 12-14-2007 - 5:52pm |
I am stressed and I know I could just feel better getting an answer with a test, but I refuse to because I'm scared of a +.
Here's a little background: We have a 3 year old. My LMP with that pregnancy was my wedding day. We thought we'd start from Day 1 with "not trying, not preventing." But honestly, due to some health issues, we NEVER thought we'd conceive in the 1st month. But we did. And what was supposed to be a very happy, joyous occasion was rather difficult. We were scared, confused, felt rushed, etc. It was just very hard getting used to Husband and Wife AND parents.
DD has always been a more difficult child (poor sleeper, poor eater, etc.). She's wonderful and delightful but at 3 she is very stubborn and STILL doesn't sleep through the night despite all our efforts.
DH and I have talked about TTC again and I'd like to when DD is 4 or 5, but DH's reaction is more like, "I'll be ready to have another kid when we forget all we went through with her." It HAS been rough, but he's also becoming more open to the idea of having another baby in the next year or 2.
We're not actively TTC but since the day DD was born we've been using condoms RELIGIOUSLY. But about a month ago he started penetrating without one (basically, "playing with fire"). He's never come inside of me (he eventually does put a condom on), and we've talked about the possible consequence of pregnancy, but he just sorta has shrugged and said, "OK."
He did this just the other day and I once again reminded him there is always the slight chance that I COULD get pregnant from his playing with fire. And he said, "I know, I know, but you're not pregnant now, right?"
Well, no, I'm not. Or at least I don't think I am. For some reason I didn't mark my period dates (like I ALWAYS have) for the last 2 months. But I found a post joking about something DD commented on re: pads last month and that was around the 13 or 14. I'm pretty sure I ovulated WHILE we were on a 2 week vacation visiting his family, and we did very little then. And I've been PMSing. Crampy, crabby, etc.
So why am I nervous? Because if I AM pregnant I just keep thinking (and fearing) all those emotions from the first time will happen again. And honestly, I'd like to experience the JOY of finding out you're pregnant instead of the fear. And also because last time I thought I was PMSing, too. I waited 2 weeks after my period was due to test because I just kept thinking that my period was coming.
I don't have the balls to mention this to ANYONE besides here on an anonymous board. Please help.


Well, I am in the same boat as you. I have two girls, they will be 3 and 2 in January. I don't know exactly when my lmp was, but it is either a couple days or a week overdue. I stopped taking my pill because I didn't like the way it made me feel (moody, no desire,etc) and we have been *kinda* careful. Meaning, he has pulled out, which I know is not foolproof at all. Dh did say that if we happened to get pregnant it would be ok, but we don't really want another one right now. I am too scared to test, I just keep thinking AF will show up. I am not having alot of sypmptoms,
You'll have to keep me posted if AF shows or if you test.
No AF today. Some more cramping last night and this afternoon. I told DH this morning I was getting nervous. He seems OK with it. Probably because I'm not freaking out in front of him just yet. No real symptoms, but more a lack of certain PMS symptoms (the main one being a migraine-I always get one when PMSing). I was bitchy as hell today and really quick-tempered, though. So maybe that's a sign AF is coming?? Who knows. I'm going to give it a few more days.
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