What to do???????Help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
What to do???????Help!
9
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 11:15pm
My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for 16 months now. We have had 2 miscarriages in the past 7 months and have had some very difficult times. We started trying again 2 months ago and nothing yet. He got called away on business for 10 days and of course, it will be during my ovulation time. So, we have been debating on whether or not I should fly out for a few days to see him. I will not have anything to do except work out and relax in the room. On one hand, this might really help me relax and on the other it could put more pressure on us! It is not the greatest area, so I am told, and will not be able to venture out on my own. His days are very busy and he will leave about 8:00am and return after dinner. Part of me really wants to go and not let a whole month go by again (it seems like forever) and the other part of me says we will take the month off and maybe that will be good. I know if I don't go, there is no chance of getting pregnant. We both feel the same way about me flying out to see him, one minute we want me to and the next we are not so sure.

Help! Please let me know if anyone has any advice on this!

Thanks!


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 11:42pm
Hi, you kind of remind me of my aunt. Her and her husand were trying for the longest time and they ended up pregnant about twice but lost them in the earl stage and now she can't get pregnant. What i think you should do is 1)have him get checked for his sprem level, and to see if he can have kid's. 2) if it is ok on both the you should get checked to see if you can have kid's, and if you can then i would ahve the doctor but you on some med's to see if they get things going. The best of luck ttc is hard. I really think you should do that.

Summer

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 11:52pm
Hi Summer,

Thanks for responding, I do appreciate the info.

We have already had every test in the book. Everything is negative. My husband has been tested. It is now just a matter of it happeining again. I just feel crazy flying to where he is to try to get pregnant.

Thanks again,

Jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 11:59pm
I wouldn't fly out just cause you are ttc, what i found that worked best for me i got this of a tv show that while you are haveing sex's once you are done bring you're legs up in the air and but a pillow under you're butt, that way the sprem can get down there alot easyer. And anougher thing is try haveing sex's 2 days or one day before you ovulate never do it on the day of ovulation and do it the day after too.


Summer

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 12:04am
Been there, done that! We have tried just about everything. That is why it is so hard. We are both very emotional about the whole situation. We thought I was pregnant this past month and when we found out I wasn't it was very difficult. Than we found out that he had to go away on business for 10 days and it happens to fall right when I O. After trying for so long a month seems like forever. We'll see.

Thanks for the info.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 12:09am
You're welcome the only thing i can tell you know is to take clomid if you haven't already, and i also heard try it on a very romantice date. ANd don't thing about it try to tell you're self it will come on its own don't want it so badly i know thats hard for someone ttc but it might just take that. All i can say is clomid and other drugs, with those med you might get more then you wanted but i don't think you will mind too or three bundles of joy.

Summer

Avatar for artzgirl
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 10:48am
Hi.

This is just my opinion, I think that if you go meet your husband and make it a sort of "rendevous" or a romantic getaway, it could be fun and take the pressure off you both. Sometimes a couple of days away is all you need to make it all work out.

I don't think that's crazy. I think it's spontaneous! :)

Good luck (to all of us!)


Rachel :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 12:04pm
Thanks Rachel!

I think I might go ahead and just do that. It is a hard decision because of his work schedule doesn't leave us much time to spend together. I will be alone most of the day and part of the night, but that might be a good time for me to relax. Thank you for telling me I am not crazy. Sometimes you feel so anxious that you make yourself think that your crazy!

Thanks again,

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 12:09pm

I agree with Rachel. Make it fun. If its a nice hotel you should be able to get a massage or do some nice things for yourself while you were there. Make it fun and romantic. It doesn't have to be all about TTC. Just get away for a while and make the best of it. Good luck. Keep us posted! :-)


Michelle

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 12:16pm
Thanks Michelle!

I appreciate the advice. It is nice to know that there are other people that think like me.

I will keep you updated.

Jennifer


Edited 11/7/2003 12:19:13 PM ET by jengrl11