Is it okay if sib styles don't match?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Is it okay if sib styles don't match?
15
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:30am

Here's my dilemma - As most of you know, my dh and I have agreed to the name Lorelei for a daughter. This is actually a bit exotic for our taste (especially his), and it's a miracle that he even agreed to it. My problem is finding sib names that "match". When it comes to boy's names, I'm discovering that we're a lot more traditional. Our top contenders are currently Ethan and Christian. Is it okay that our daughter's name style won't "match" our son's? I LOVE the name Lorelei, and I'm not giving it up. I'm just worried that people will look at our son's name and think wow, that sounds really strange with Lorelei. Why didn't they give more thought to his name? When, in reality, we're just more traditional when it comes to boy's names.

Your thoughts? This has really been bothering me, and I could use your feedback. There's always the chance we will have all girls, but I'd like to be prepared.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2004
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:49am

I don't think it matters if they match or not. I have Ethan and Logan and am going with something totally different for the next 1 or 2. Lots of people's tastes change. Name your children what you want to name them and don't worry about what others think. :)

Terra.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2006
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:57am

You are smart to think ahead to future sibling names. I didn't realize when we named our son Grantson that we were boxing ourselves out of using Gretchen, a name we both love, in the future.


Not every name sounds great with Lorelei, for sure, but lucky for you, Christian and Ethan both work great! All three names have been around for centuries but have

Ginger

Avatar for haarlasr
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:57am

I think there's a pretty big range of what "goes together," and IMO, Lorelei goes just fine with Ethan or Christian. I also think it's normal to see a variety of styles within the same family, and it's really not that big of a deal. Eventually, the kids will go out on their own anyway and won't always be listed next to their brothers and sisters (except in their families' minds, of course).

My girls are Megan and Julianna (nn Annie), and I hope that Megan never thinks that her name is less beautiful than Julianna's. I do think their nicknames go great together, though (Meg/Megan and Annie), so that works for our family.

Also, even though Lorelei is a little more unusual, it's not "out there." I don't think you have anything to worry about (except maybe finding a girl name that's just as beautiful ;-) ).

Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2004
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 11:00am

Ok, so I posted the same thing twice. My first response didn't show up for awhile so I reposted. :P

Terra.




Edited 9/21/2006 11:29 am ET by belle_petite
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2005
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 11:19am

You're in good company. As a whole, the country tends to be more conservative when it comes to naming boys. I don't think it's at all unusual for parents to be a little more daring when naming a daughter.

Just look at the stats: In 2005, the top 5 names for boys were given to 113,548 children, as opposed to the top 5 names for girls, which went to 93,705 babies. If you look at raw numbers along with rankings, an interesting graph emerges. From #1 through #232, more boys are given the corresponding name than girls. (ie #100 is Carson for boys and Katie for girls. There were 4,297 Carsons born in 2005 and 3,100 Katies.) When you get to #233, it evens off. (There were 1,422 Camdens and 1,422 Aliyahs.) From #244 through #1000, the slope reverses. More girls are given the corresponding name than boys. The gap widens the further you go. So the 1000th girl name, Maryjane, was given to 241 girls, while the 1000th boy name, Blaise, was given to only 163 boys.

I wouldn't bat an eye at Christian, Ethan and Lorelei. Actually, I think that's a nice set and I think it's totally within the norm.

I really only really notice "non-matching" sibling anmes, when styles clash dramatically. If your daughters were Ruth, Esther, Miriam and Lorelei, then yes I'd say that was a problem. Maybe not a dealbreaker for you, but it would be guaranteed to garner some strange looks. Similarly if your daughters were Lorelei, Talia, Piper and Mary, I'd think it was a bizarre pairing. And since I generally expect boys names to be more conservative/popular, I wouldn't notice the dichotomy unless it was REALLY pronounced. Like John, Charles, Henry and Madysin.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2003
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 11:57am

I really don't think that those names are so far off as far as matching goes. Lorelei isn't weird or "out there" ... it's not too far from traditional to me.

I LOVE Christian for a boy. I think Lorelei & Christian go just fine together.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 12:58pm

Well if it helps, more traditional boy names are favored by many families (even those who prefer more "exotic" or unusual names for girls), so a sibling pairing such as Lorelei and Christian wouldn't seem odd at all -- especially since both could have German ties. Just look at the SSA's most popular names for any given year. Last year's most popular boy names were Jacob, Michael, Joshua, Matthew, Ethan, Andrew, Daniel, Anthony, Christopher and Joseph. Certainly, the girl list contains many more traditional choices as well, especially with the current trend toward more old-fashioned names, but the boy list is much more standard (and tends to remain so any given year).

On the other hand, you may find that by the time you have another child your tastes have changed a bit. Maybe you'll love having a dd with a more unusual name, and want the same for a son. You never know. That's why I wouldn't let worries about future children's names taint your love for your first dd's name, KWIM? It's a great name. You love it. Cross the future names bridge when you come to it. ;)

If it helps ease your mind, there are plenty of more traditional German names that would be great with big sister Lorelei. And if anyone comments on them seeming less exotic, just mention that they're both German. Enough said.

For example, if you like Christian and Ethan, you might also like:

Christoph
Conrad/Konrad
Karsten
Kiefer
Kilian
Egon
Emmerich/Emeric
Engel
Evert
Gregor
Hagan
Heinrich/Hendrik/Henrik
Jurgen

HTH

~Kelli


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 1:28pm
HELLO!! personally, i think christian or ethan sound just fine with lorelei...christian, to me, is a lil on the exotic side. i think your "sibling" ideas sound just fine. its really a personal choice-people might think you were a lil strange if you named your dd say moonbeam and then named your son john. thats really on different ends of the naming spectrum-i think your names are on the same wavelength...take care!
joanne
maman2goons@aol.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 1:37pm
hello, again! this is just a ps attached to my first reply(but my first reply hasnt popped up yet-so i cant edit)-i know a family that has 3 kids-2 girls and a boy-their girls are katelynn and alaina...their son is ryan. and no one thinks it "weird" or "unmatching"...i would have to say again, its just a personal choice-i went with violet rose for my first and isabelle grace for my 2nd-and 1 girl i work with thought i should have used another flower name for my 2nd, but my tastes had changed and i wanted my dds to have their own name and i fell in love with isabelle. and they sound beautiful together, imo-just like your name ideas/choices. take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@aol.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:34pm

I dont think siblings names really need to "match". I never really thought about it until I began seeing names on baby name boards, but mine and my brother's names dont match AT ALL. My parents named me Jamie Leigh (1981) so it was pretty trendy then, and sort've "cutesy" sounding. Then my brother came along in 1984 and instead of going with a popular name for him, they decided on Kurt Erik after my dad and my uncle.

So they've got a Jamie Leigh and Kurt Erik. Jamie and Kurt. Doesnt really match at all, but we both like our names and no one has ever acted like it was bizarre that my parents chose one trendy name, and one formal, not even really popular name.

Besides Lorelei really isnt "out there". Its not common, but it still sounds nice with Christian or Ethan.

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