Know 1st Cousins w/ same first name?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Know 1st Cousins w/ same first name?
10
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 9:09am
My best friend is having a bit of a dilemma with naming her son the same name as her nephew. Just wondering how common (or not) it is to have two first cousins with the same name???
Suzy Q
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2006
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 9:30am
I would guess that's it isn't very common. Has she talked to her siblings about this? If I had a little boy I would be pretty darn annoyed if my brother came along and named his son the same thing. I guess if she has no relationship with them and there aren't very many family get togethers it would be no big deal, but I can't imagine how it would work in most situations.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 10:11am
It's kind of a weird situation, but they all "take" each other's names. First come first serve type thing, but this was a name she had picked out since I've known her. Not sure how often they see them. I think they're spread out and live in all different states.
Sue
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 11:31am
In my family it would be very bad if one of my cousins were the same name as me. Of course I am one of 20 grandkids and we all live in the same town are are together frequently. We are very close knit so it would be a big deal. If the family is out of state and they rarely get together, then it might not be as much of a problem. Although I dont think, no matter how far off I lived from my siblings, that I would ever use the same name. Even if its one of my favorites I would choose another name. Then I wouldnt be the one getting accused of stealing names and my child wouldnt have to be one of two in the family.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2003
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 12:09pm
We have 2 Elizabeths in my family, but they go by different nns, so there is no confusion. I think that if it is the exact same name and is not a family name they both want to use to honor someone then I would find a new name. But then again, how close is she to her sister? Do they live in the same area?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 12:14pm

A couple of generations ago, it was VERY common in my family. My grandmother is Alice, she had two first cousins with the same name. There were also at least 3 Johns (all had nicknames though), many Margarets, Katherines and Annes. They went by Meg, Peg, Marge, Kitty, Kathy, Kate, Anne, Annie and Babe.

I wanted to name my oldest after my dad who had recently been diagnosised with cancer. My dad's name was John. My fil's name was Richard. So we choose John Richard as the name but nn Jack. My older sister already had a Jonathan Richard so they were close but not the same. Well, I did have my son and named him that. When my younger sister was expecting, she asked me if I would mind if she used the same name. My dad had since died and her fil (also Richard!) had as well. So that baby would have been John Richard as well. Not sure what she would have called him, but I think they were thinking Jack. I told her it was fine, how nice to honor the children's grandfathers, we would just call our son Jack W. at family events. That's when she reminded me that her married name began with a W as well! LOL! At any rate, she ended up having two girls and never got to use the name. But we live almost 2 hours apart so it wouldn't have been a big deal.

I would tell your friend to speak to her nephew's parents and see how they feel about it.

Mary

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2005
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 2:21pm

My cousins did this. Both of the little girls were named Margaret, both go by Maggie, and were born just months apart. The only thing is that they have different last names and live in different states now. I still think its odd, but that's just me. I do think it would be a problem if they had the same last name though, too much confusing for the future........I have seen this happen first hand as my Dad nad brother have the same first names, but different middle names. Things are confused all the time--bills sent to the wrong home, phone calls to wrong numbers, ect.

Theresa

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 2:40pm
I have a friend who had two sets of cousins with the same first names, David and Michael. Their fathers were brother's so that they had the same last name. Their mothers (who couldn't stand each other) picked out their names. It just made the woman resent each other more. Everyone thought it was ridiculous. It was especially confusing for my friend's grandmother because she had two grandsons named David and two named Michael. They were always known as "Alan's David" or "John's Michael."
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2005
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 2:51pm
It's not exactly the same name, but two of my nieces (different moms) are named Annie (2) and Anna (12). Frankly, I thought the sister who has Annie could have come up with another name or used Ann as a middle name, although Anna hasn't seemed to mind. I guess the age difference helps.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-1999
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 10:50pm
In my dh family many, many 1st cousins have the same name. In fact all the brothers would name their first son after their father. If they had a second son it would be named after the mothers father. First daughter after the fathers mother and so forth. This is something that I didn't care for and we were the first one of our generation not to do this. After we didn't do it most of the cousins after us have stoped too. I think some names the same would be fine, but 5 boys all having their first boy and girl with the same names is a little much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2006
Fri, 04-21-2006 - 9:41am
The Etiquette for this is to not "steal" for lack of a better word, a family members first name in the same generation. Unless it is used for a middle name or a form of it. Such as John and Jonathan. It only causes frustration and confusion. There are so many names to choose from anyhow, why even chance an arguement.