Looking for help on names.......

Avatar for long35acre
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Looking for help on names.......
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Fri, 09-24-2004 - 1:52pm
We had a son die last year. His name was Ian. I am pregnant again and would really like to incorporate his name into this new child's name. If it's a boy, I may choose Ian as a middle name. But that won't work with a girl. So I am trying to find names that have "ian" in them. Such as Jillian or Lillian. My last name starts with L so I think Lillian will be too L-ly. And I'm really not wanting a J name, therefore I'm looking for other ideas. Different is ok. But not so different that it's weird. ;)

I have tried searching baby name sites, but the closest I could find is where you could look for a name ending in or beginning with. So if the "ian" was in the middle of the name, I couldn't do a search.

Thanks for your help.

Connie

Connie, mom to Julia (10), Jacob (8), and ^Ian^ (9/12/03)

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Registered: 08-01-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 2:19pm
you could always use a name that ends in "ianna" - that would have the ian within it,

Brianna, Lianna, Rhianna.

I truly sympathize with you on losing a child, but in all honesty I don't think it's exactly fair to the new child to have to honor that child with their own name. Unforunately it could be taken as the new child replacing the deceased child and that child can't be replaced of course.

I would advise you not to do what you're planning, but of course, only you know what's really right for you.

I think giving a boy the middle name Ian is really not a good idea.

if it weren't for boys names starting with I being so rare, I'd say just give the child the same initials that Ian had, but other I names are really difficult to come by.


good luck to you on a safe delivery and healthy child with this baby.

Avatar for long35acre
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 2:40pm
I'm very sorry I posted this here. I am not replacing my child. I am trying to honor my child. My daughter's middle name is my dead grandfather's name. I am certainly not replacing him. She is still her own person. She just gets the honor of sharing something with someone I loved. I have my grandmother's name as my middle name. I have never wished for anything different.

Is Ian a bad middle name because it's my dead child's name? Or do you just not like Ian? Is something wrong with Zachary Ian Smith? WTF?

I read your response to another person about giving them a family name and how wrong that was. Well, I think you are wrong. WRONG WRONG WRONG.

I advise you not to give others advice anymore.

I will try to find help somewhere else where people are more sensitive to others. I rarely post on parentplace boards anymore simply because there are so many people with weird ideas that they are right on topics of their choice and I chose not to get caught up in petty little fights. I just couldn't help myself on this post. But lesson learned. Ask friends, not total strangers.

Connie, mom to Julia (10), Jacob (8), and ^Ian^ (9/12/03)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 2:52pm
I'm so sorry you got the response you did. I named my first son after his uncle who died of leukemia at age 5. I felt it was a great way to honor him, and it didn't seem weird at all.

One idea I had was to go to www.babynamer.com - it is my favorite baby name site - you can look up Jillian or Lillian and then click on "Similar" - it will show you names that are similar - possibly others with the "ian" ending? I was trying to do it for you but the site wouldn't come up for some reason.

Ideas off the top of my head:

Eliana (God has answered me)

Marian

Marianna

or Miriam -which means "bitter" - for the bittersweet blessing this baby will be

Blessings,

Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 3:17pm
So sorry for your loss!

Here's what I came up with:

Julianne

Juliana

Liliana

Liana

Mariana

Marianne

Rhianna

Rhiannon

Triana

Triannon

Tiana

Tatiana

Gianna

Gloriana

Oriana

Ariana

Loriana

Eriana

Adrian

Adriana

Adrianne

Kiana

Briana

Sabriana

Iliana

Eliana

Aliana

Aliciana

Alisiana

Georgiana

Shianna

Diana

Kariann

Geriann

Sheriann

Carianna

Garianna

Sianna

Bianca

Viana

Viviana

Vivian

Doriana

Louisiana

Indiana

HTH,

Ali

Avatar for long35acre
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 3:24pm
Wow! What a list. THank you. I'm sorry I over-reacted in my previous message. It's obviously a touchy subject.

But I really like Adriana and Ariana. Will have to run those by dh. My daughter's name is Julia, otherwise I'd like Juliana (which was almost her name anyway). I also like Liana or Liane/Lianne. I have only seen it spelled Leanne - I like the other version.

Thanks.

Connie, mom to Julia (10), Jacob (8), and ^Ian^ (9/12/03)
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2004
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 4:34pm
My freind from Russia has the namne Iana och hennes syster andra namn was Ianja.

Maybe it should work but i don't like naming Childern after deceased siblings.

A dear freind to my family discovered that before her, her parents had had a daughter by the name of Ylva Maria , the same name she had, the baby girl had died at 3 years old.

She had found Ylva Maria Photo album that ended at 3 years old and some of the Photos look like hers in hers photoalbum.

Really sick, the girl changed her name to Alva after that.

Hug Fru Trygg

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 5:52pm

Hi, I read your post and had to respond. I had a daughter die in 2002. I know how it feels and how sad you must be. Even 2 years later - I miss my daughter like crazy. As for the name - I think you should use Ian as a possible sons middle name. My daughters name is Brianna Rae. If I would have been pregnant with a boy his name would have been William Raymond. It turns out I am pregnant with a girl. Her middle name will be Bernice - B for Brianna, and Bernice for my grandmother who passed away when I was a kid. As for "Ian" type names for girls - there is always Arianna, Brianna, I especially like Eliana. Good Luck naming your baby. Remember as you read these posts from people - they are entitled to their own ideas. Unless they have lost a child they can not understand the pain, and suffering we go through. I think it is perfectly acceptable to name your new baby honoring your deceased child. It is not like you are giving the baby the same exact name as the other child!


Good Luck with this pregnancy and finding the perfect name for your baby!


Karyn

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2004
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 6:35pm
i am sorry for the loss of your son. it must have been a hard year for you and your family.

be thankful that you have another love coming into your life. i know it is hard not to worry about how your child will be treated concerning their name but, i don't think you should you should stress yourself out. why can't you give a girl the middle name Ian? if that is what you want- do it!!! i'm sure any boy would be honored to be named after his big brother he never knew. by the time he is old enough to ask about it he ewill be old enough to be told why his brother is gone from you.

as for a little girl, i think you will figure out a name to tie Ian, by the time you have this baby. i would do the same thing in your situation. i tried to incorporate my grandmothers names with my kids. i did my best.

good luck, kelly

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2004
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 8:30pm
Connie,

I am so sorry for the loss of your son. I think it would be a wonderful honor to name his sibling in his honor. Many religions do this, and I think it would be a tribute that your child would like. It's not like you're giving this next child the exact same name!!

Jillian is one of my favorite names. I also like the idea of using the "ian" in the middle of a name. Julian is also an option for a boy. Another idea is using the same meaning. We used the meaning of my Aunt's name, and found a name with the same meaning. It's wonderful that their names are united by that strong connection.

Hannah

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 10:46pm
I didn't get to read all the responses yet (and I am sorry for the negative one you received), but the previous post made me think of Marian. I believe it is still a form of Mary, and therefore has the "bitter" meaning, and it also happens to end exactly with "ian". Not to mention that it is a very pretty name (and I'm not sure how everyone else pronounces it, but I keep thinking of Maid Marian, courtesy of Robin Hood ... which is not an unattractive image at all). HTH :)

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