Nicknames?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2006
Nicknames?
21
Sat, 04-14-2007 - 11:42am
Hi,
I just had a question about "short" names. I really like Lainey for a girl and Leo for a boy, but DH thinks they cannot stand alone. Do they sound like nicknames? Will people always ask for their "real" names? We are not TTC until next summer, but I really like to pick names in advance. If they are too nicknamey, what nice names could work for Lainey and Leo? Thanks.
Tracy
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2006
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 12:57am
I think Lainey is a very nice name for both a child and adult. I don't see it as childish or immature. Most of the names that I like sound like nicknames and I've actually posted about it before. Some of my favorite girl names include Maxie, Marlee, Sophie, Lulu, Allie, Aarti, Ella, Emma, Hanni, Hattie, Poppy and Izzy. Most think that these are all too nicknamey. I think that if you love it, then go ahead and name your child Lainey. I don't feel that it is selfish to give your child a not so formal name. I also don't believe that she would be passed up in the workforce because her resume said Lainey and not Elaine. So I say do what you love.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2007
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 2:48am

Why shouldn't you just name your child whatever you happen to love, whether it be Precious Iklekins or Sweetiepie Honeybuns? Because while the choice may be up to you, you are making it for someone else. You are making this important decision on behalf of another person who is unable make it herself. She has to live with your choice her entire life. She has to live with it when she wants to be taken seriously, when she's applying for a job, and when she's trying to gain acceptance in her field. It will follow her everywhere, and she won't be able to escape it. You should base your decision not on what you think is cute, but what you think is best for her. If you had to pick a name to represent yourself to the world, would this be the name you would pick? What if you wanted run for president? What if you wanted to be a doctor, a judge, or a member of the clergy? Your child is likely to someday want to be respected and taken seriously. The name 'Lainey' doesn't exactly inspire respect IMO.

The previous poster wonders if one's name even matters, and doesn't think it could cause one to be passed over for a job. Name discrimination does happen. I've seen it. People make assumptions about people based on their names; assumptions about intelligence and socioeconomic status for example. They often act based on these assumptions. If nothing else, your child's name is going to affect her self-perception. If someone wanted to present a serious image to the world but her name was Honeybunie, she would feel self-conscious even if nobody else reacted to her name in any way. If someone loves the name Loviebuttonsfluffybear, should they just go ahead and use it because it's their decision and they should use what they love? Of course not! If they were choosing a name for themselves, it would be nobody's business, but they are choosing a name for another human being. The welfare of that human being should trump the taste of the parents.

At least call your daughter 'Lane.' Give her a choice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2006
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 11:56am
message deleted


Edited 4/15/2007 11:59 am ET by karamich27
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2006
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 12:00pm

I hardly think that Lainey and Sweetiepie Honeybun are the same thing! While I can appreciate an honest opinion, I hardly think it necessary to be blatantly rude. I think when most people are asking for advice and opinions, they are not anticipating women with daggers waiting in line to completely belittle them or insult their intelligence. I happen to be an extremely intelligent person, who also happens to believe that if we need to name our children something based on what looks good on a resume, then our society is definitely worse off than I originally suspected. I am sorry to be the one to tell some of you...but "work" is not the most important thing in our lives!

I really do appreciate everyone's posts that were heartwarming and kind, regardless of whether they think Lainey and Leo can be names on their own or just nicknames. Thanks again.
Tracy

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2006
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 12:11pm
What is the difference between Betsy and Lainey? Plus if the child doesn't like her name in the future, she can change it herself. I know many people who aren't fond of their name but they seem to be doing fine in the professional world. If she feels that Laine is more professional, she can use that as a nickname for Lainey when applying for jobs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2007
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 1:06pm
Lainey is a sweet name. Do not listen to the detrators if that is the name you love. I have visited this board a couple times and wonder if people who have time to post lengthy dissertations on baby names are really out there in the corporate world to know what goes on, but I am and can assure you that while there would be a big difference between individuals named Honeybun and Lainey, there would be no significant difference between Lainey and Elaine or any of the other names suggested. I work for a Fortune 50 company and we have 2 Senior VP's named Heidi, among others whose names probably would not pass muster on this board. These women are tremendously respected not because they have a pretentious name, but because they are impressive women. I don't suppose anyone has noticed that the Secretary of State's name is Condoleezza??? Or that the woman second in line to the Presidency's name is Nancy? Or that one of the first female network news anchors' name is Katie? I think people who would be rude to someone seeking advice are probably not people who you would want to rely on to name your child anyway.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 1:23pm

I think the original intent of this thread has somehow been lost. According to the title line and complete wording, you WANTED to know if these names were too nicknamey, especially since your dh already feels they should not stand alone, AND you asked for formal names these could be shortened forms of ...

"I just had a question about "short" names. I really like Lainey for a girl and Leo for a boy, but DH thinks they cannot stand alone. Do they sound like nicknames? Will people always ask for their "real" names? We are not TTC until next summer, but I really like to pick names in advance. If they are too nicknamey, what nice names could work for Lainey and Leo? Thanks."

If you simply wanted to be told "yes, they're adorably cute and I'd name my child Lainey, Betsy or Fanny as a given name any day!" then you probably didn't really want to ask that question. You've already decided. I realize it's hard to judge tone when all you have is the written word to go by, but simply restating the fact that Lainey IS a cutesy, juvenile form (it is) and pointing out some reasons why it might be thoughtful of you to give her an actual adult name just in case she might ever want one isn't intended to be rude. Nor does it imply that anyone thinks you're less than intelligent or that "work" is the most important thing and all children must be named "based on what looks good on a resume." Fact is, however, you already KNOW Lainey is a childish nn, or you wouldn't have posed this question. I assure you, no one is sitting around in anticipation waiting for just such a post in order to belittle or insult you.

Nicknames are used as familiar pet forms, generally for children or people you have an intimate relationship with (best friends, adult children, grandchildren, etc.). In the past, they began to be used as given names for slaves in an attempt to belittle and degrade them, implying they weren't full human beings worthy of actual formal names (you'll notice the same often applies to the most popular pet names, so hopefully I don't need to further explore this thinking). Therefore, it seems a bit short-sighted to apply that very concept to your own child. Not because you think less of them because of it, but because it can come across as immature or at the very least ignorant -- again, not that YOU are immature or ignorant, or that the name will give that impression to every single person who comes across it, but it's hard to understand why someone would rather gamble on something like that, just *hoping* colleges, employers, etc. wouldn't discriminate in such a way (they most surely do), when it's as simple as giving her a formal name on the birth certificate and calling her whatever your heart desires, KWIM?

Again, I honestly doubt anyone was trying to be rude to you in any way, but if you ask for opinions, you'll get them. I actually just quickly read through the other replies and you'll notice that twice as many found Lainey to be very nicknamey and too cutesy and/or juvenile for a given name. Only three thought it could stand alone, and many of those mentioned liking nicknames such as Izzy, Maxie and "Aarti" as full names, so that's not exactly the objective opinion you seemed to be looking for. Of course there will be a few people who think it works, or we wouldn't have children with Abby, Nikki or Maddy as given names (and you'll notice these always elicit negative reactions when listed in random birth announcements and such). You can't just pick and choose which comments you personally prefer (well you can, but then there's really no point in asking, is there?).

If you like the nn Lainey as a given name, you'll use it. No one will try to stop you or call you names. LOL I think most were just trying to give the honest opinions and personal experience you asked for.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2006
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 1:40pm
Thanks for your generous input. I completely agree with you! I do value others' opinions, and I did ask for opinions...I just didn't realize that there were 2 or 3 people who come across as being so "rude". I know that many people who responded to my post did think Lainey was a nickname, but most of them were very nice about telling me. I honestly did not expect everyone to say Lainey is perfect. I am also out in the workforce, and I know many people that are doing very well with "cutesy" names. My friends I work with are named Kelley, Angie, Jamie, Stephanie, Nicole, Heather, Amber, Ashley, & Maddie. These are the names that they always use. I do not think that someone needs a "long" or "old-fashioned" name to be taken seriously. Anyway, thank you again.
Tracy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2007
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 7:45pm
I didn't mean to be rude! You did ask for people's opinions, so I gave you mine. I figured if you didn't want honest opinions you wouldn't post on baby naming forums. By using extreme examples such as "Sweetiepie Honeybun" I was trying to make the point that not all nicknames are appropriate given names. I had absolutely no intention of belittling you or insulting your intelligence, and I sincerely apologize if that's the way I came across.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-1999
In reply to: tracylkm
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 10:57pm

I think Leo is a strong stand alone name. Lainey is quite pretty and I have read this thread and normally I would lean towards a more formal name but I don't think Lainey is terribly cutesy or as awful as some posters seem to think it is and I am pretty traditional. I wouldn't hear Lainey and have a judgement about that fwiw.


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