Serious Disagreement over name! HELP!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Serious Disagreement over name! HELP!!!
13
Mon, 12-11-2006 - 1:16pm


Hi,

I am not due until next August, however, my Fiance and I are already having serious disagreements over the baby's name! He already had the names he wanted picked out and isn't budging on them very much. Here is his reasoning: If its a boy he wants the boy named after him. If its a girl he wants her named after his mother, who died when he was a teenager. Here is my reasoning: On the boy name, this is just my personal opinion (no offense to anyone else) but I personally don't like it when a child is named after their parent. I feel they should have their own name and identity, after all, they are their own unique person. I would like to name the boy after my father, who also passed away when I was young, but he is not willing to do this. So, my solution is to name him after my fiance but call him by his middle name, which I like a lot. As far as the girls name, I know this is really terrible, but I really don't like my Fiance's mother's name. I feel awful, and I want to like it, but I just don't and I really don't want to call my daughter a name I don't like. I felt a compromise would be to use her name as the middle name, and pick another first name that we both like.

My fiance keeps saying that because I got to pick my first daughter's name (I was a single mom with my dd) that he should get to pick the name for this one since he has never got to do this. I feel it shouldn't matter, I think we both need to feel good about this child's name.

Someone please help on this! Do you think I am being unfair? Or is he being stubborn? Any input or suggestions on how to resolve this issue would be really appreciated! It may seem silly, but we keep having serious arguments about this already!

Thanks!
Ren

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2006
Wed, 12-13-2006 - 1:14pm

Okay to settle this once and for all.... It is simple if it is a boy then please let him have a Jr. there is something about men and Jr.'s I know, and If it is a girl it is your decision.. Okay how bout if the baby is a Boy the First name of the father and the middle name of your father and if it is a girl first name you like and middle name of his mother that is fair.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Wed, 12-13-2006 - 2:05pm
hello!! heres a couple of my suggestions-use his moms name as middle name...or find a version of the name you may like better...like say her name is lynn-maybe you can agree on lynda or madalynn...or something like that. maybe you can use part of her name in your dds name...or masybe they can start with the same intial...as faras the boy-my hubby is named after his dad and it has led to a bunch of credit mix ups, people calling us looking for his dad and not my dh...things like that-i would think it would be so much easier to name the child their own name-use dads first name as the middle name-i know SO many boys and girls that are named that way-it seems to work. or choose a name that is close to the name without being the same...good luck!!!
joanne
maman2goons@aol.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Wed, 12-13-2006 - 10:04pm
One of my grandmothers names was Janette - and I had the same issue.

 

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