siblings' initials- please help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
siblings' initials- please help!
12
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 1:34pm
HI, I'm new to this board and hope someone can give me some good advice. We have two biological children and are in the process of adopting a third child internationally. The two bioligical childrens' first names happen to begin with the same letter simply because those are the names we liked. We didn't set out to have them match. Now with our third child, do you think we have to continue with that initial? We can't find a name we like that begins with that initial, but everyone seems to think it would be wrong to use a name beginning with a different letter.
What do you think?
Thanks!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:06pm
it is 100% what you feel comfortable with. i personally would continue with the same initial path as to not possibley create any hard feelings in the future...like there is that also of a special bond between the 2 biological children and s/he is different in another way. i know us adults don't see things that way, but children can think that way. hope that makes sense. maybe throw the letter at us...maybe we can help come up with some ideas?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:24pm

I have 3 kids. Two have the same initial for their first name; one does not. It has never been a problem. It doesn't bother my kids and no one has ever mentioned it.

Pick a name you love. Congrats on your adoption.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:29pm
Thanks for your response! I actually do feel that way too, but we just have had no luck with the name and there are other names (beginning with other initials) that we love. It kind of seems silly to just give her a certain name because of the first initial even if we don't really like it. Our other kids are named their names because we really liked them- I don't want to short-change this child by naming her something we don't *really* like. Does that make sense? Well, maybe you guys can help find a name we love that *does* fit with the others-- The initial we're looking for is K.
Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2003
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:37pm
I would normally say no problem, name them whatever name you love. I usually think using all one initial is too cutesy anyway, but with the adoption being thrown in it muddies the waters a bit. If you really can't find a name you love with that initial then I would try to use some kind of name that reflects the heritage of where she was born. Good luck with the adoption!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:50pm

Perhaps choose a name that has deep family significance, so that your child will know that he/she is just as much your baby and loved by the family, no matter that he/she is not your biological child. Perhaps a name after/in tribute to a grandparent or other relative, or you or your husband, with a middle name from the language of his/her country of origin? This may help to cement ties (in name at least) to your family, and will create a sense of a special connection.

What are your other children's names (just to get an idea of your naming style)?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 2:55pm

hmmm...K...suppose you dont' know if you are adopting a boy or girl yet? i'll just throw some names out for you. of course i don't know your naming style or your other 2 childrens names...just some ideas. wishing you the best of luck and congrats on the adoption! :)

Girls:

Kylah
Kenzie
Kinsey
Kylie
Kennedy
Karla
Kallie
Kari
Kaimbry
Krista
Kristine
Kirsten
Kristen
Kyla
Kesha
Kristal

Boys:
Keegan
Kyler
Kyle
Kaden
Kody
Kameron

As you can tell...i have a much easier time with girls names. HTH!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 12:31pm

I know several 3-child families where two children have the same initial and one has a different initial. In some cases it's the first two who have the same initial and the third is different. In some cases it's 2 & 3 who have the same initial and the first one is different. In one case 1 & 3 have the same initial (both are girls) and the boy in the middle has a different initial

these are all families I know very well. I've never seen any evidence of jealousy or wondering why one is different.

I think if you can't find a name with that initial that you really like, you should forget that and pick a name you really really like. There are way too many great names no matter what your style to limit yourself to such a specific criteria that you then abandon names you really like.

I don't think it'd be wrong like other people are telling you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 3:36pm

I think part of it depends on the gender of your two children and the gender of the child you adopt.

Pat

Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response. --

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-15-2005 - 9:06am

I think you should find a name you love and use it- dont try to find a name that fits criteria. You end up settling for a name. you should be really excited about the name you give your child. I dont think it should match if you cant find a name you love.

adding K girl name suggestions:

Kirsten
Kiersten
Kayla
Kyla
Kiley
Kaylee
Katherine
Kathleen
Kimberly
Kendall
Kimball
Kirstie
Kristin
Kristie
Kacey
Kaedan

HTH!




Edited 7/15/2005 9:11 am ET ET by aaotrl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 07-24-2005 - 11:08pm
Normally, I would say, pick the name you like but here (with no fault of anyone) I think your 3rd child may feel left out in general-at least he/she should not have this added reason to feel that way. Maybe not, I dont know. Just a thought.

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