What do you do when...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2008
What do you do when...
23
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 4:49pm

...Your family doesn't like the names you chose?

We're narrowing our list down and about half of our family member say they don't like a single one of our options.

Would this/Does this matter to you?

(PS, many of you have probably seen a few posts from me already. Our options are:
Sebastian
Keegan
Beckett
Sawyer
Spencer
Jaxon...
give or take a few, lol)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2006
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 5:07pm

This answer may or may not help, but honestly, what we "do" is NOT discuss baby names with family . This is our seventh baby and we've not ever talked about possible names with family members -- just kept the name as a surprise for when the baby is born. It's worked out well! The only people I typically discuss names with is my bff who is very easy to talk names with, and here at i-village for opinions and suggestions.

I don't know if it's possible, but if you want to go this route, perhaps you can NOW say, "DH and I decided we want to choose our baby's name by ourselves, so will let you know when the time comes what his name is." If someone pushes it you can just give general, vague answers when they question you in the future.

I guess some people do fine with including family members in this; I just have never seen that it would be worth the hassle.

HTH!


Darla

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Darla
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2005
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 5:09pm

When it comes down to it - you both have the finally decision.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2006
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 6:05pm

I haven't been in this position yet, but I do think it would be hard. I think my feelings would be hurt. However, I always think about it in terms of style/ taste. My taste in clothing, decor, etc. are very different than my family members', so why would I expect them to like the same names as me? I agree w/ pp that I would say from now on that you and your DH are only discussing names between you 2, so the name will be a surprise when he's born. I don't think you should let their opinions influence you. If you were considering ridiculous names, I might think that your family was right, but your names are GREAT. Your family is probably just reacting this way b/c your list doesn't consist of all top 10 names that they're used to.

Good luck!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 6:31pm
I have the mentality that I don't give a care what other people think of the names. But if you are sick of hearing their opinions than just tell them that you guys have decided to announce the name once the baby is here.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2005
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 7:55pm

I've seen most of those names brought up several times on the boards here, so I wouldn't consider any of them to be too "out there." I agree with PP that the best course of action would be to stop discussing names with family members, because it's just going to stress you out unnecessarily; you have other things to worry about during pregnancy! Once the baby is born, they'll love him no matter what, and even if they still don't care for the name, they'll grow to like or love it, too, because they'll begin to associate it with your child.


I feel for you, because I know I'll have that same problem when I start to have kids of my own: most of the names on my list are pretty old-fashioned, so you don't hear them very often these days.


Sebastian is my favourite from your list! And since the movie "She's the Man" (the Amanda Bynes film based on Shakespeare's "Twelfth Night") came out, it's a little more familiar without being a talking crab! I like Spencer, too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 8:12pm

we never told family our name choices... may be a good time to start. ;)

HTH

Karen

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 8:40pm

Matter? Sure--I'm not callous. Would it be the deciding factor? It would depend on why they liked it. If it was a matter of family history, bad experience or a valid point, it might be. If it was a silly thing (my MIL didn't like Liam because it sounded "too Asian") I'd set it aside.

And the only two on your list that I don't like are Jaxon (the x spelling looks a bit silly to me) and Keegan (no reason--just don't.) The rest are handsome and should age well.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 8:47pm
I think no matter who you discuss your name ideas with, someone is not going to like it. There probably isn't a name on the planet that you could poll 10 people have them all love it. I see no problem with any of your names.. they're actual names.. spelled correctly.. so in that instance, I think the name will grow to fit the baby and people will get used to it. I can see family having huge problems with naming your child Superman or something just nutty.. but, provided it's an actual name, I think you just have to go with what you love.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:32pm

My way of doing things would be to make up something you know

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2005
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:44pm
To be honest that is why we dont include our family in the process until we have picked a name. Then we dont really care what they say! ha! :) I think its best to keep family as uninvolved as possible since its not there baby its YOURS!! So for me I wouldn't care at all what they have to say! *hugs* Stay strong and pick a name you and dh love! :)


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