Anyone else outed when they didn't want to be?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2007
Anyone else outed when they didn't want to be?
Sun, 01-20-2013 - 6:45pm

I know many women like to shout things from the roof tops, but I guess I am sort of tired of stupid remarks. So I never announced on facebook. Then on an unrelated post my sister (who I am not close to but my Mom blurted my news) posted a congratulations and then when I didn't respond went into details. Of course one of the people instantly notified had to be a man who suggested I get pregnant again at my son's funeral.

I deleted, but I guess my attitude is that those who are important or I receive support from I let know or have figured it out already in real life (I am about 34 weeks along now). Facebook isn't a great area for support after a loss except on support groups, people want you to pretend or you get slowly deleted as a debbie downer. My attitude is that I don't want them to share in my joy if they can't support me when I need it.... And PAL isn't always an easy ride, you need both.  I want this baby, but I still want my son and very few people really understand how they can coexist.

Why do people think they have a right to know or a right to share? Especially it seems like the offenders are the ones who never say anything on important dates, never sent a congrats note when my son was born... I feel like some people are voyeurs.

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Fri, 02-01-2013 - 12:00pm

UGH.  I'm sorry that happened to you.  I can imagine you were/are very frustrated and upset.  Did your sister realize that she "outed" you and that you didn't appreciate it much?

 photo snowsiggy.png