not meant to be

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2006
not meant to be
6
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 9:11am

I posted this in the TTC over 40 forum but I wanted to post it here too. First before I say anything, I want to thank you guys for all your support and positive thoughts. I feel it.

I went in for my U/S yesterday, and they couldn't find a heartbeat. I am in the process of miscarriage. The reason seems 2-fold:


-Dianne, 41 yo
DH 37


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2009
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 9:54am

I'm so so sorry you're having to go through this. I logged on this morning hoping for good news from your ultrasound.

Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself. I think it can be harder to have a loss when you've told no one- you feel like you have to hide the devastation. So, take it one minute at a time. When I had my loss, in a back-and-around way, it helped me to know that so many other women had gone through the same thing, that I wasn't as truly alone as I felt.

I'm hoping your body will just go ahead and miscarry naturally, so that you don't have to go through any of the other. Is there anything natural you can try?

Big hugs,

Sunday

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 10:37am

((HUGS)) I am so sorry for your loss. I am like you, I would rather keep myself busy and distracted during the day. There is plenty of time for grieving at night.

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Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 3:47pm

I'm so sorry that you lost the baby, sending you lots of (((HUGS))).

Avatar for dani_d
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-1998
Mon, 01-31-2011 - 2:52am

Oh gosh....I'm so terribly sorry. {{{{{HUGS}}}}} I imagine with the baby implanting so close to the cervix, that may have been the cause of the spotting you were having. I know the pain all too well of having an ultrasound and not seeing a HB. I saw a HB twice with both my pg's last year...but they didn't survive.

I hope that this resolves quickly and you can find some peace. It's just the most horrible thing to go through. {{{HUGS}}} and prayers :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2006
Tue, 02-01-2011 - 5:38pm

thank you all


-Dianne, 41 yo
DH 37


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2008
Tue, 02-01-2011 - 10:59pm
I'm so sorry. I've had 3 miscarriages in my 40's and saw the heart-beat twice (the 3rd was a blighted ovum.) It is more common as we age, but it's still just as painful. Saying that, I have had 2 healthy babies and am pregnant again in my 40's, so there's still hope! Sadly, I had to have a few miscarriages to get 3 healthy babies, but for me it is worth it. (But everyone handles it differently.) It's definitely painful and I can't say I could continue on with that, but there is hope.
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