Anyone else worried about people's reaction & opinions? Scared to tell.

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anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Anyone else worried about people's reaction & opinions? Scared to tell.
9
Mon, 08-06-2012 - 8:48pm
Hi everyone. I may be the oldest one here. I found out I was PG one day after I turned 44. We TTC 2 yrs ago but it didn't pan out so this was a surprise. I'm nervous but happy & what can I do? What's to be will be and I'm 14 weeks with everything going well so far. I tell myself who cares what people will think but honestly I do care. Ya, I'm old but hey it happened & this is a first between my husband I remarried 3 yrs ago so I feel it was meant to be. I haven't told my family yet, no one. I am not even slightly showing so it has been no problem but I dread the day when I am gonna have to come clean. Any one else?
Avatar for cowboys_grl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2010

awww, congrats!!  I am soooooo happy for you!!!!!

I was 1st pg., when I was 43 (oops, but I did have my 1st at 31, so 2nd pregnancy at 43)...unfortunately lost our angel at 7 weeks, THEN I became pg. again at 44 and lost our 2nd angel at 8 weeks.

I, honestly, was so excited to be pg. & held my head up & bragged about it, so everyone was happy for me....I'm 'iffy' right now, if I want to try again (still 44), I'm scared to lose again, but trying to build up my courage.

I say, don't be nervous about it, be proud! And good for you!  :heart:

Kiki (hit my magic age of 45 and no longer TTC),but mom to a beautiful teen DD & 2 angels in heaven & married to my best friend

Community Leader
Registered: 11-01-2011

Welcome and Grats on your wonderful news!  :smileyvery-happy:

You aren't the oldest one here or the oldest that has passed through here.  There have been others at 49 and in their early 50's..    one that is 52 and another that is TTC at 53. 

You aren't 90 years old..   you aren't old at all.  My DH's grandfather was 98 and he would have smacked you for saying 44 is old.  You need to be proud of who you are and embrace how you feel..   age is a number.

If you are healthy, both physically and emotionally... and able to love and care for that beautiful baby... that's all that matters.

If I were you, I'd tell everyone I cared about and knew cared about me.  I had one nasty reaction from my DH's grandmotther (on his mother's side)...and truthfully.. I could care less.  She's a horribly nasty woman who never has anything nice to say about anyone, so her opinion means nothing.  Everyone else has been lovely...and if they weren't, then we wouldn't involve them.  Their nastiness is their own issue.. nothing to do with you or that beautiful lil one. 

Embrace the people around you that love and support you.  Get rid of those that don't. 

Hugs

Wendy

Community Leader
Registered: 11-01-2011

I do understand ... I know it's easier to say "don't let it bother you"..   but I really have come to that point in my life where others have to be happy with their lives and either be happy for me or go elsewhere.  I just can't worry about what others will think, that's just too much stress and drama. 

The one hurtful thing I heard (through my hateful sister in law when she came up to the hospital) was that her grandmother said "what business does she have having babies at her age.."  ...I'll admit.. that hurt, I cried for a sec in the bathroom by myself...and then I just gathered my hormones together, walked back out and ignored the rest of the crap she said.  She's a lonely woman, never had a real relationship, no children...selfish and always negative. 

Everyone else has been supportive..  and if not, then what business do they have being allowed in my world?  If anyone is going to be negative then they are no good for me.  They should move along and be happy elsewhere.

 

 

 

Wendy

Community Leader
Registered: 11-01-2011

I don't feel old at all.  I'm not sure what I'm supposed to feel like or act like at 40+, but I'm not doing it! 

Wendy