Going on 43 and shocked with baby #6

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2012
Going on 43 and shocked with baby #6
14
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 10:56am

Hello,

I just found this forum as I was looking for some place to share some feelings and get some support.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2000
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 11:06am

I responded to your other post about being worried to tell people. I thought I would copy it here too. :)

I had the same response when I got pregnant with my sixth. My Mother in Law went nuts. Wouldn't even talk to me about the pregnancy. She was a major bummer...Kept going on and on to other people about how 2 was too many, and how that baby would never get enough attention. I never argue with my in-laws but I had one day when I'd had enough and yelled - stay out of my uterus Embarassing but cathartic!
...But God had other plans for us too. I had my baby at 36.5 weeks totally healthy, but wouldn't you know it, he was born on her 68th birthday! .......Take that MIL. If that wasn't proof he belonged then I don't know what could be. And he is the absolute light of her life. There isn't a more loved, more chrished baby on the planet. When my other 5 kids get home from school they don't say where's mom - the say where's the baby and carry him off. He is an absolute joy as I am SURE your baby will be. I would think of some outrageous way to tell your mom. Send her a cookie bouquet or something . The more positive you are the more positive they will be. And if they are not then try and deliver on her birthday - told you so!!!!

BEEBES

R
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2012
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 12:12pm

Thanks for the post!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2012
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 12:48pm
My story is different but has some similar themes. I went through a terrible nasty divorce and then met the love of my life who helped me go through the last stages of that mess. During all of that, everyone had to put in their two cents telling me I was jumping into a new relationship too quick. Well, then I got pregnant, which was planned. Though in the back of my head, I was thinking: How am I going explain this one?. Then one day I saw a quote and for some reason it really empowered me: " My Life. My Choices. My mistakes. My lessons. Not your business." I realized then that at the end of the day the only one I need to explain myself to is me and of course then my spouse and children. The next day someone at work said, well I think it would be a terrible idea for you to have another child at your age. I was able to sit up and say, wait a minute, what right do you have to say that and really it is none of your business. I took me a while to get there and we didn't tell anyone we were expecting until I was 13 weeks, but then I could say this is my life and not yours and when we told people we did so unapologetically. Tell them when you are ready and when you hold that baby, it will be the best thing that ever happened :)

kiri
Avatar for cowboys_grl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2010
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 3:16pm

Well, your 'oops story' is a blessing to me, since I am 44 and TRYING to get pg. (again)....DH & I did get pg., when we 1st started trying (I was 43), then sadly we lost our angel (I found out at 11 weeks)......so now, trying again, to not much luck. You give me hope that it's possible!

But, I congratulate you....what a blessing!

Kiki (hit my magic age of 45 and no longer TTC),but mom to a beautiful teen DD & 2 angels in heaven & married to my best friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2008
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 4:37pm

I can totally relate to your feelings. I am 43-will be 44 when this baby is born. I am currently 16 weeks pregnant and I can say just within the past couple of weeks have I gotten over the initial feelings...I don't even know what to call them-not sad..but I just did NOT want this baby.

I had just given all my baby stuff away. Started planning trips and things to fix up around the house. I don't know how we can afford another in daycare. I just was not happy.

But the last couple of weeks I really have gotten over that. I wouldn't say I'm "excited". But I definately am starting to look forward to meeting this little one I guess.

We never know what God has planned for us. We are just here to go along with it and try to accept it. I hope that you too start to feel better about your pregnancy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2012
Fri, 04-20-2012 - 3:54pm

cowboys_grl: I wish you luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2008
Fri, 04-20-2012 - 4:18pm

Ha! All things I forgot to mention you said as well. The car...yes bigger one is definately needed now. I *think* we have that worked out or will by the fall. But the house...there is 5 of us in a 3 bedroom 1,200 square foot house.Our house is now worth less than we owe so

Avatar for cowboys_grl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2010
Fri, 04-20-2012 - 5:02pm

>>cowboys_grl: I wish you luck.

Kiki (hit my magic age of 45 and no longer TTC),but mom to a beautiful teen DD & 2 angels in heaven & married to my best friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2000
Fri, 04-20-2012 - 11:17pm

To be honest with you - I was trying to figure out how to tell my MIL that I was pregnant with #7 and was as worried as you were. I was also worried about telling my OB since I had a

R
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2000
Sat, 04-21-2012 - 12:43am
Oh, and by the way - I shipped every baby thing I owned back East to my sisters via AMTRAK before we had our sixth. They got the mother lode as my 4th pregnancy was a set of twin boys. We thought we were done after the twins - then my husband decided he missed our little girl (my oldest turned 15). We laughed and laughed when there was a little doodle on our ultrasound. 4 boys in a row!
Sending all the baby stuff away is probably the best way to ensure getting pregnant :) I have to admit, it's been fun getting new stuff. I never really chose any of my original things because we had been given so many hand-me-downs/gifts. I've made due with so much less too and haven't felt deprived. I'm a bit smarter now that I am "old" and I know I don't need every bouncy contraption in the store. It's almost freeing. I spent money on the car seat, but I think every baby should get a new one anyway. They get so gross, and they come out with new safety features all the time..... I didn't spend money on a real stroller - got the Snap and Go instead. He is still in it at a year. Love it. I finally paid 19$ for an umbrolla stroller last week. I didn't get a real high chair. Wound up with one of those small ones that attach to a regular chair. I love it. It's so much nicer then those huge highchairs and we can take it with us easily. Anyway after 5 kids - getting some new loot for the sixth is so much better than crawling through the attic trying to find the old stuff. I hate that.

R

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