'telling people' (how?) - - after so many losses (& 'only losses' for me)
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|Wed, 04-20-2011 - 3:39pm|
ok, so i have a question... this is something i need to start thinking about, although we will wait as long as we can before 'telling people' for a number of reasons... i'm sure i don't have to explain that in great detail here.
i have told a few people who i knew would have kind, compassionate, loving and optimistic responses. i have been right UNTIL today when i told an old friend / past coworker. she knows about my history and her response was what i 'expect' will be the response we will be most often met with... from (close) friends and family who have witnessed our going through so many (and only) losses over the last 8 years.
- they will think we are crazy (why would we risk it after so many losses AND my age)... truth is, we were trying to avoid pregnancy for these very reasons, but looks like God had other plans. we are embracing them and feeling blessed / grateful, but taking it day by day.
- they will automatically 'assume the worst'... that EVEN THOUGH i have made it past any of my other pregnancies, that CERTAINLY this will be 'like the others'... is this necessary for them to think like this and THEN communicate it... certainly, they won't say that 'directly', but believe me, the indirect communications (beating around the bush) all but communicate these thoughts.
i could elaborate further, but you get the general idea.
here is what i want to know... have you all been in this same place before? if so, how did you handle it / tell people?
if your 'news' was met with a negative / unfavorable response, how then did you respond to THAT.
i want to be able to 'direct' people's responses, basically, if at all possible. i want to set it up / present it where they will FEEL lead to / WANT to provide positive feedback. however, i don't want to present our pregnancy as a 'bed of roses' either, like i am approaching it with a blind naiveness. however, i do want to approach it in a balanced way with the most positive outlook that i can. i want people to share that.
sadly, at this point my fear of dealing with how to tell people (but mainly dealing with their probable responses) are more of a concern to me than anything. i am feeling relatively calm and hopeful about my pregnancy now. i'm just trying to take it day by day and believing God will be with me, regardless.
i would welcome your thoughts / experiences in how to deal with 'telling people'... again, we will wait as long as we can before telling people... how long do you think someone can wait? (;