An update . . . not sure how to feel anymore

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2010
An update . . . not sure how to feel anymore
13
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 8:30pm

So I haven't posted here too often.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2007
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 8:36pm
Sorry Carmela.
Feel free to post here as much as needed, thats why the board is here.
Im sorry its been a rough road for you. It sounds like an awful roller coaster as you said. I would be constantly worried myself.
Im glad everything looks good with your babe, but very disconcerting that no one has an answer for bleeding, That would drive me crazy.
Of course ive read plenty of stories just like yours that end in healthy pregnancies/babies & hopefully yours does as well.
Whats the plan with your OB? When do you go back?
((HUGS)) & fx for you
*mindy*
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 9:07pm

Oh Carmela.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2008
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 9:24pm

(((hugs)))

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2010
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 9:35pm
HUGS!!!! I'm sorry you have been through so much. I read a lot about bleeds and many people said they bled heavily and in the end all was well. I really hope that is the case for you. I know it all sucks and I wish you didn't have to go thru this. Feel free to come here any time you are having a tough time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2010
Mon, 05-09-2011 - 11:34pm

Carmela I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time! I had really heaving bleeding from 6wks-13.5wks. some of it was due to an SCH but my SCH was so tiny that my OB couldn't figure out why I was bleeding so heavily, it was heavier than a normal period (which for me is heavy already). the entire practice was completely stumped. but the baby never seemed to be in distress, and everything is good now. I really hope that things calm down, there's nothing that will make you crazier than bleeding, especially when it's unexplained. I hope you can find some peace and we're ere for you 100%.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2009
Tue, 05-10-2011 - 12:21am

I actually think I know how you feel. And I'm so sorry you're little one is causing you so much trouble! I know last summer I was so excited and felt like I had found an amazing support group to help me work through my PAL brain. And then I lost my baby. Again. And it was frustrating because all of the women I had been on here with went on to have great pregnancies and I ended up feeling hopeless. Again. It's hard because you want to be so happy for other people who have been through the same struggle that you have and are now being successful, but it's hard to ever really let go of the idea that your own preganancy may not work out. Please know you are not alone in feeling this way. And there are several women on here who are having far form normal pregnancies - I have absolutely no reason to think that my current pregnancy will turn out any different from the last 3.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2010
Tue, 05-10-2011 - 11:05am

I'm so sorry you're going through this, Carmela. I know you're feeling guilty right now. It's not that your son isn't enough for you...it's that he's so perfect you want to give him a sibling to love. {{HUGS}}

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
Tue, 05-10-2011 - 1:18pm
I'm so sorry for what you're going through, so sorry. Big hugs...

What works so far for me (and I know won't work for others) but every single morning, I wake up and thank God for the beautiful baby growing inside of me, thoroughout the day, I thank Him for the beautiful gift of life growing in my tummy, and when I go to bed at night, I thank God for another beautiful day with a beautiful baby in my belly, I pray for a safe, healthy, happy pregnancy, and a safe, healthy, happy delivery with a perfect little baby who is happy and healthy and who lives a safe, happy, healthy life and who outlives his/her mommy and daddy.

It works for me, for now. But I still get crazy PAL brain. I totally have my moments - like every day. My goal this week was to NOT call the OB's office at all this week... I failed when I had to call yesterday because I ran out of my prometrium, BUT I didn't call for worries, so I guess I didn't fail ;)

I sure hope this roller coaster smooths out very soon for you. After experiencing loss, we should be entitled to an easy and uneventful pregnancy.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-1998
Tue, 05-10-2011 - 1:28pm
Carmela, I'm so sorry for the horrible bleeding episode, hun. That must have been so scary. :( But the good news is, your baby is just fine. Try and hang on to that hope, ok? It could be that it's a SCH that's pretty small or kind of "hiding" behind the placenta where it's difficult to see. When I was 38 weeks with my last ds, they did an ultrasound because I was having extreme pain, unrelated to contractions, and they couldn't figure out what was going on. But they wound up inducing me and, low and behold, when he delivered the placenta, he saw that it had begun pulling away form my uterus, but he never saw evidence of that on ultrasound. So, what I'm getting at is, doctors are not infallible. Sometimes strange things can happen that have no explanation.

Please don't feel like you're being selfish for wanting to give your son a sibling. I have 5 children, and so I guess some would say that I'm being selfish for wanting another one, but it's not like that. It's that I just have more love to give. And I'm sure you're the same way. You're an awesome mom....don't ever discount yourself, sweetie.

You're in my prayers. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2007
Tue, 05-10-2011 - 3:36pm
I'm so sorry Carmela. I know you felt bad for saying it, but I too would probably want the stress to just go away. I seriously hope that this LO makes it through and you just have a huge success story at the end of all of this. You can always come here when you are feeling low, but I can see why you've been staying away. Please feel free to look here for support. We all want you to succeed, and help you through this horrible experience.
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