Single, suddenly pregnant and now what? Yes or no?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2011
Single, suddenly pregnant and now what? Yes or no?
2
Mon, 12-19-2011 - 3:03am
Hello everyone Thank you for taking your time reading this, making your thoughts and maybe giving me your advice/opinion/experience. Well- here I'm - 33 years old single and pregnant. How did I come to the point? The "dad" and I had this almost relationship going on for good 7-8 month... We spend like about 1-2 weekends per month together, went to movies, dinners and spend the nights together. We had a great time together. But we were and still not in love with each other. I lost my great love to someone else and after broken heart stories that the most of us experienced themselves and could beat every soap opera - I somehow lost the believe that I'll be loving someone so much again (I mean a man) and that he'll love me... That he ll not cheat on me, not leave me without nothing (no apartment, no furniture etc) ... Then my doc found cancer cells in my uterus, which had to be removed surgically (they cut out a nice piece of it) - that was in march- before I met the "dad". And I have been some first dates- but non of them worked. And to be honest I wasn't interested. Not really. And I started a new job - as a sales person in healthcare- which is challenge and totally different after working 10 years as a radiology tech. But I did my master degree and I want to make career! So here I am - pregnant- 4/5 weeks and I don't know what to do! I talked to him- and he'll support me at least financially although he won't promise to be a great dad. But he said that he doesn't believes that I can make career and have tha baby. It would be easier and more convenient if I had an abortion. For both of us. My best friend (one is a mum one not) are both supporting me - the best way they can- they say that I'll never love someone so much as the baby and it will love me as no one can. And that I can make it happen. It'll not be easy- especially as so single- but it'll maybe make me complete and open me up again. I was raised that I can do anything, achieve anything- with work! My parents gave me everything they had and I always felt loved and trusted. I am an optimistic person- But somehow I lost that optimism and I dont know where and how- but I want it back! I want to make the right decision - for the right reasons not because it's scary or convenient! Im so scared- I'm standing at a crossroad and I feel like everyone is yelling at me to decide and I don't know what to do!!! Today I have my first meeting/talk/ultrasound with my doc... Please- I'm looking forward for your advice!!! Many thanks J
Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Hi J,

How did your appointment go yesterday? Was your doctor able to offer you and advice or put your fears at ease at all?

I can certainly understand how you feel that you've lost your optimism. Once someone breaks your trust, it is so hard to find it within yourself to trust again. I would agree with your friends when they said that you'll find such a wonderful love in your child. It really is unlike anything else in the world and that love is unconditional. It sounds like you have a good support system around you and that they'll be there for you regardless of what decision you make.

Sending you many (((HUGS))) and please keep us posted and let us know how things are going.

 photo snowsiggy.png

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005

 photo snowsiggy.png