Going a bit nutty waiting (M)
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|Sat, 08-07-2010 - 9:21pm|
I was shocked I got pregnant in the 1st place. I have an almost 8 month old son (12/17/09) who is still breastfeeding A LOT and have never gotten pregnant this close together my older kids are all about 3 yrs apart, they had to really back off on breastfeeding for me to get pregnant. Anyway, I got super tired before my period was even due, and got a + before it was due, too. Then my jeans wouldn't fit on really fast and I started having diarrhea (never had that before during pregnancy) and not being able to eat (also never had that) and went, "Whoa this pregnant so soon and still breastfeeding thing SUUCKS!" I got an appt at what should have been 9 wks and was talking to my ob/gyn about how different (worse) this pregnancy is while she was poking around (which actually hurt more than usual) and she asked, "Are you sure about your dates?" Which I am. At that point she did an internal and listened and then told me I'm measuring, "a lot," bigger, and while there are other things that can cause it, she's doing an ultrasound to confirm twins. The 16th.
I'm going nuts with the wait. I'm not even sure why ... if she's so sure ... except that having 4 kids already, I know my pregnancy will most likely continue to be MUCH harder, I can't even imagine the end, and my mind keeps fast forwarding to, "How will I do THAT!?!" on a bazillion different things after they're born. Like breastfeeding. Strollers. Carseats. Its just scary. Plus while my DH and I weren't using b/c on purpose, because we wanted another one close if possible so our little guy would have a playmate and we could reuse baby stuff and then get rid of it and be done with baby days ... I guess I really didn't think it would happen this fast. Plus, I feel weird thinking on it because without knowing for sure I feel like, "horse before cart," and yet I can't turn my brain off.
A lot to throw at you all but everybody else just says, "Oh, TWINS!!" with screeches and excitement and I'm just ... not able to do that yet. Especially not with my husband gone right now. I'm just exhausted.
Cheryl & DH Marcus w/ Tristan (11 1/2), Justice (almost 9), Veronica (6) and Mason (almost 8 mos)