we just broke up, now I'm pregnant!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2013
we just broke up, now I'm pregnant!
Tue, 06-25-2013 - 7:22pm

Hey, i'm freaking out a little.  Me and my boyfriend broke up a week ago and I moved back home.  I took three home pregnancy test and they  all said positive. I'm going to the doctor next week. Its not that we are young, i'm 28 and hes 32 but I broke up with him because he wasnt really treating me right and he wasnt thinking about any kind of future.  Now i feel like everything will be messed up, i'll be pregnant with someone who i'm not withs baby. I dont make enough money to support a baby and my self.  I don't think I could do abortion because I don't think I could live with that my whole life.  What if I couldnt get pregnant when I wanted to.  I know its no one elses fault but our own, I just had plans like to finish my degree and get a better job.  I eventually want to get married but feel like if I have a baby now it would all be messed up.  I don't want to be a single mom.  I'm scared.  Does anyone have advice?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2013
Tue, 06-25-2013 - 10:27pm

Do you have family you can lean on or a good friend? I think that it is important to maybe have a good friend go with you to the doctors. I think having someone to lean on will also help. If your ex was not treating you right then I wouldn't suggest going back to him even if you are having his kid because I feel it probably won't make him treat you right and you don't deserve to be treated badly. You need support, someone you can lean on, just someone to talk to... thats just the best advice I have right now. 

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Wed, 06-26-2013 - 9:22am
Hugs! I was in your situation (not the boyfriend treating you mean part, but the rest) at age 18. If you decide not to do an abortion, then decide what other options you do have. Adoption is always an option, but you would most likely need his signature on the paperwork at the end, but its something to explore. I would talk to your parents since you indicated you moved back home. How would your parents feel about helping you out with things such as babysitting, expenses while you go back to school for a better education and job. It can be done, women do it every single day. Hugs, and if you decide to go forward, there is also a single moms board here on IV that has some wonderful, supportive women on it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2014
Sun, 05-18-2014 - 3:09am

I'm in the same situation... I'm 19  and 25 weeks....  I found I was pregnant after a month of not talking to my baby's dad.. At first he said he was going to be there and help me with everything but my parents wanted us to start a family and to leave together.. Something he told me from the beginning he wasn't going to do it.. We had a huge fight because I just don't want him to just see the baby once o twice a week.. And I'm going to have to take care of him by myself.. Because he is really not going to be there much.. And at first I was really scared.. I even thought of getting an abortion.. Because I'm just 19.. And having a baby was never in my plans.. And alone... But one day at work I had some bleeding.. I went to the emergency room.. I was really scared... When they told me it could have been an abortion I just wanted to cry... They did an ultrasound and I saw for the first time my baby... He was just jumping and kicking.. And I just knew I couldn't live without him.. Know I can't wait to meet him in August... His dad is trying to be in his life and I just don't know what to do.. But if I can do it you can do it... I'm just 19.. Never think about an abortion... If you really don't feel any love for that girl/boy.. Adoption is the best.. Because if you get am abortion you may regret it later on...