I don't want him to settle for being a 'C' student

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
I don't want him to settle for being a 'C' student
18
Wed, 01-11-2012 - 10:04pm

Nathaniel's 2nd report card of the year came home today.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005

When he got the rejection letter I felt so bad. They really sugar coated it and made it sound nice, he honestly couldn't undertand by just reading the letter himself that he had not made it.

Oh my gosh, I know exactly how you feel. Ds9 wanted to do handbell choir this year. They've never had a tryout but apparently they had more kids interested than they had handbells and they ended up doing a type of tryout. They didn't explain that and ds didn't understand he'd be expected to read music well (I have no doubt that if they explained, he could have learned it). Then, they sent a letter that was so crazy vague and sugar-coated that he actually thought it was a 'wecome to bell choir" note. He came home super excited and I had to break it to him that he was not being welcomed, he was being rejected. UGH!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
Thank you. I know some of the teachers in the middle school, mainly 7th and 8th grade teachers b/c they were my middle school teachers and I know they are great teachers. I have heard good things about the middle school SPED teacher too, from those middle school teachers who taught me. I am going to start taking him w/ me to visit my old teachers (I still go back and see my 7th grade math teacher and have for years, she was at my wedding, we are very close) so he can be in the middle school. I think it will help the transition. He has known my 7th grade math teacher for years, we always trick or treat at her house and have since he was a toddler. If we can just get through this next semester I have high hopes for middle school.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2007

It sounds like

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
No I don't want to make him feel worse you are absolutley right. I am going to take many of these ideas all of you ladies have given me and start using them ASAP.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
Thank you :) Having him ask her and her email me is a good idea. I know he is working hard w/ his homework at least b/c I see him doing that.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
I thought I had some activity like that working out last semester. He really really really wanted to do robotics team and did not get picked. When he got the rejection letter I felt so bad. They really sugar coated it and made it sound nice, he honestly couldn't undertand by just reading the letter himself that he had not made it. My sister had picked him up that day and she read it to him, he asked her 'Monster, does that mean I didn't make it?' (he calls her Monster, don't ask, family thing but its a term of love I promise) she felt awful telling him no you didn't baby.
I had really talked to him when he tried for it aobut how he would have to prove to me he could handle both that and his homework and then it didn't happen.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
Good question....I haven't really gotten much of an answer from him or his teacher. My best guess is that he is sitting there pretending to do the work and then just bringing it home.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
great idea! I do have him read them to me outloud w/ homework if he is struggling w/ the directions. I never thought of putting them in colors like that though. I used to use a highlighter to help him w/ his handwriting when he was in earlier grades. His handwriting was so hard to read and his spacing was awful. He was in OT for a weak fine motor skill. What I would do is use a yellow highlighter to highlight spaces for him to write the words. That way his words were spaced properly and he had to write his words in the highlighted box I had provided. Kept things alot neater and made him more aware of what he was doing.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2004
Well, first, how is the teacher grading? If she is doing a bell curve, he is average. Somebody has to be average or being above average means that it is average. He is still in elementary school too - plenty of time for him to get work habits down. Also, how are the other kid's grades in comparison? Is this teacher a really hard grader on everyone? Some classes are like that - one teacher does not expect as much effort for a high grade as another does.

Now, those above were all for YOUR mindset, not his. My mother was a smart woman, in my opinion. For us 6 kids, grades were not what was emphasized. Effort was emphasized. I studied my rear off for Spanish in high school and just barely passed. My step brother never opened a book and got the same grade. He got chewed out, and I didn't. Some teachers expected more work to get that great grade. Sometimes for some of us could do that, and some times, lets face it, being of average IQ, we got an average grade.

Yes, discuss with him what he can do to get better grades. Have him go to the teacher and ask what he needs to do to get better grades. Have him tell the teacher to email you what she said so that you can help him keep on task from home. If he follows through and still doesn't get great grades, praise him for his effort.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2009

Is there some activity he really wants to do? (sports, karate, some club, whatever)




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