Thinking about HS

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2005
Thinking about HS
Sat, 08-18-2012 - 3:37pm


My triplets are going into Kindy this year and I'm freaking out!  My friend said she's never seen anyone so bummed about their kids going to school before.  At back to school night, she told me I looked like I was going to a funeral.  

They all went to pre-k last year, MWF for 2.5 hours.  It was great actually!  They did well and had fun.

We considered private school but just can't afford it.  So public school, which they are enrolled to be in, starts Tuesday.  We are strongly considering HS.  But I'm just so overwhelmed at the thought!  I have no plans!  No curriculum.  No home school groups... though I'm sure I could find some.

I've read countless articles and blogs from people who HS and I agree wtih the beneifits they talk about.  And the downfalls of public school that they write about make sense to me too.  But I can't help but wonder if the kids will be at a disadvantage, or regret that they did not have the school experience that the majority of kids in life have.  

Where will they make new friends?  We have familiy friends and the kids are really close, but that's about it.  They still keep in touch with some of their pre-k pals, and then there are people at church that we could try to hang out with too.  We do put them in sports, dance, etc... but ya know, they don't really form friendships because you go to class, have to pay attention, and then you leave.

I'd love any words of wisdom!

Thanks :smileyhappy:

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Sun, 08-19-2012 - 10:34am

I can't speak for your girls but here's my experience both as an almost triplet (I am 10 1/2 months older than my identical twin sisters) and as the mother of 3 girls who didn't enter the classroom until 8th, 6th, and 2nd grade.  And then 2 of them returned to home school for various years after that.

While my sisters and I did the whole public school route (no pre-school), we played with each other just as much if not more than outside friends in the early years.  It wasn't until jr. high (middle school for the younger generations) that we went our separate ways with friends.  Fast forward to my children.  My girls all had neighborhood friends to play with.  It didn't matter that they were home schooled and their friends all went to the local public school.  My son, now 14 1/2, going into 9th grade, went to public school for elementary school.  Never had a best friend or even a core group of friends that he could hang out with outside of school.  Even now he doesn't have friends that he sees outside of church or the classroom at the charter school that we home school through.  But that's his personality.  He might not connect with friends until college or after.

On another thought, depending on your state, you probably don't have to put your girls in a formal school setting until later.  In CA, the mandatory age to enter school is age 6 for 1st grade.  While almost everyone goes to Kindergarten, it's not mandated by the state compulsory attendance laws.  As a family, we didn't start formal home schooling until 1st grade.  My son did go to Kindergarten but that had more to do with my working full time than him needing to start school then.


The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2011
Mon, 08-20-2012 - 10:06am

We have found lots of friendships for our kids, that I homeschool. The one that went to public elementary( a few years then home schooled until ninth grade) now goes to public high schol with the same kids, few are still her friends. She has made new ones, has differing peer groups based on classes and interest more than just that they were in elementary school together.

 It is nice to find neighborhood friends and know the kids on your block. My kids play with some of the neighbors and are in the least aquaintace friends with many of them. That is always important. In our neighborhood we have kids in many differing schools in the same age range, due to lots of school choice around us. There is neighborhood public, choice charter type public, a few differing private and homeschool. We have not always been the only homeschoolers in our neighborhood. Right now we are, as the other two families moved out of state.  

I let the kids decide if they wanted to go back to organized school in the older years. One was ready in 9th grade, another feels ready for 6th grade and I prolly will keep my 4th grader until 6th or after, her choice. Another reason we did not do high school was cost of curicula at home, and I was having time management issues trying to homeschool differing grades (one high, one middle and one elemen) you may not have that issue with all the same age! 

Wishing you good luck no matter your decision, one year at home more, will not stunt any ones growth, and you can decide to change your mind at any time!


Avatar for vegiemama
Community Leader
Registered: 01-06-2000
Mon, 08-20-2012 - 4:49pm

Are you still thinking about it?  Good.  Don't send them off to kindy tomorrow.  You don't have to, just because everyone else is.  Chances are, as sewchris mentioned, they probably don't have to attend kindergarten.  It's not mandatory in many states, though people blindly follow everyone else as though it is.  Your triplets are probably younger than the compulsory attendance age, anyway.  So relax and don't panic, thinking you have to have a curriculum and lesson plans and a classroom all set up for tomorrow...or you'll be in big trouble!  You probably don't!  HSLDA is a good place to find synopses of state laws, but they do tend to have lots of doom and gloom on their home page to scare you into thinking you need to become a member asap, so if you don't think you can look past that, just google "your state homeschool law" and it shouldn't be too hard to find what's required (or not required) in your state.  Or ask us and we can probably help you :smileywink:

As for the "social" aspect of school vs homeschool, think back to your own school days, and the social behaviors of your classmates.  Is that what you want your kids bringing home?  Or would you rather they had your gentle guidance in learning to interact with people around them?  Also, think about the family units of yesteryear.  They worked...and played...together and their social interaction was their family, because they lived on a farm several miles from town and if they were lucky, they got to go to church once a week and if they were really lucky, they were chosen to go to the store when father made his twice-yearly shopping trip.  So they didn't go to town for socialization.  Their socialization was their sibling group.  The family is still a wonderful learning tool.  If you can learn to get along with the people you live and work with every day, chances are you'll do pretty well as an adult with a job and family or your own :smileywink:  You have a ready-made social group, with triplets, after all, LOL.  

Follow your heart.  Enjoying your kids is a wonderful reason to homeschool them.  There's no magical age at which you suddenly somehow become stupid and must turn over educating your children to a complete stranger.

I hope you'll stick around.  We have a terrific group of veteran hsers here, as well as some who are at the same point in life's path that you find yourself.  We're ready and willing to help in any way we can.

Homeschooling mom to DD15 & DS11

CL of Homeschooling, Signature Showcase, Ectopic Loss, and Fertility Charting

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Mon, 08-20-2012 - 10:26pm

You already have a lot on your plate so here's a website with the compulsory school ages by state.  I don't know how up-to-date the information is so you might want to double check with your state dept. of education.


The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

Avatar for ribrit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2001
Mon, 08-27-2012 - 9:16am

You don't need to plan so much for kinder. Kinder is fun! Get a calendar and put it up. Each day, do circle time. Talk about the weather, what day of the week it is, and so on. Buy a dry erase board and write out the date on the board each day. 


I would do color days, and letter days. So, each week is a new letter, and then scatter the colors throughout the year. 1 activity that is favorite, is collecting things around the house that start with a particular letter. Kids also seem to like to cut out pictures from magazines for the letters. 


You can do progressive phonics for free. Work on counting, and then adding small numbers, and then, at the end of the year, start skip counting.


Then you have it all covered!!! Throw in some good fun and play and all that, and all will be great.


I am never ever going to send a child to kindergarten again. I am regretting it big time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Mon, 08-27-2012 - 11:44am

To add to what ribrit posted, here's a Kindergarten scope and sequence for home school.

The beauty of doing Kindergarten at home is that you don't have to spend a lot of money.  Basic arts and crafts supplies that most parents buy for their children and access to a library is all I started with.  We didn't even have a computer (of course this was back in the dark ages of home schooling in the 1980s).



The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett