I Need advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-1999
I Need advice
4
Sun, 03-24-2013 - 11:48pm

My 23 year old dd is planning to go to South Korea to teach English. I am totally freaked out about this and cannot seem to be able to change her mind. I think it is too dangerous to go there right now so I asked her to contact the State Department and ask if it is safe for am Amercan to travel to Souith Korea right now. She blew me off  and told me it is no more dangerous there than here (we live in NY). I do not believe that is true. How do I convince her not to go without making her hate me?

Barbara


 

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Mon, 03-25-2013 - 1:04am

I just looked on the State Dept website and there are no warnings about South Korea, just for North Korea. I suppose that you could call the State Dept to ask, if that would make you feel better, but even if they said it was unsafe the decision is still up to your dd.

FWIW, the son of some close friends (he's now 30yo) has been teaching English in South Korea for about 3 years and loves it. He makes very good money and has met great people. He fell in love with a lovely South Korean woman, and last month we attended their wedding here in CA...a fairly posh wedding that he paid for himself. They have returned there to work and save towards buying a house in the U.S. in a few years. 

This could be a great opportunity for your dd to get teaching experience and earn a lot of money---something she might not be able to do here. Before you try to convince your dd not to go, make sure that you are correct that it is in fact dangerous. I get the idea that the western news plays up the N Korea threat more than the Asian media. Check out this website: http://seoulistic.com/travel-to-korea/is-south-korea-safe-8-things-you-should-know/

Best of luck to your dd, and I hope you find some peace of mind.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Mon, 03-25-2013 - 8:20pm

You're probably not going to want to hear this but here goes anyway...

Your daughter is 23 years old. Of she is set on doing this and can do so on her own dime there is very little that you can do to stop her.

My hair stylist just got back from a five week study abroad program in southKorea and said she felt safer there than she does in Madison Wisconsin.

By the time my sons were 23 years old each one of them had spent at least one year living in either Iraq or Afghanistan so im no stranger to the worry that comes with sending your child into a hostile foreign land. All three of them are combat veterans of the US armed forces. At some point you've got to let them go and trust that you have done a good job in raising them and teaching them to use their skills and resources to take care of themselves.

Good luck to you, and remember to breathe!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2003
Wed, 03-27-2013 - 4:32pm

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/27/north-korea-war-may-break-out-at-any-time-cuts-dialogue-channel_n_2961324.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl1%7Csec3_lnk1%26pLid%3D290102

I would be really concerned too because the North Korean leaders seem hell bent on destruction.  And they're planning nuclear attacks, not the terrorist run and shoots and suicide bombings that have marked all of the conflicts everywhere for the past 20 years or so.  So yeah, it is a bit more dangerous than walking down the street in NY.  But you're right, she's probably not going to listen to you.  How soon is she planning on going?  Hopefully, one way or another, this will all shake out BEFORE she gets there.  My prayers are with you.  Keep us posted.

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:01am

Is your dd still talking about going to South Korea? With the recent escalation in tensions I would guess that the languge schools are not bringing in new foreigners, but who knows. In my previous post I mentioned that my friend has a son who has been living/teaching there for a few years. Naturally she was getting concerned about what the escalation meant for him, so he sent her the link to this article which he says explains his feelings exactly. The article was written last month but he just sent it to his mom so, so far, he still feels this way. It may not put your mind at ease about your dd if she decides to go over there but it might help you understand the reasoning.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/april-salchert/north-korea-south-korea-anxiety_b_2858119.html