Not such great news right now

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-1999
Not such great news right now
13
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 12:40am

I probably should have waited to share my news, but dd was so excited she told everyone...and now it's looking like she may be headed for a miscarriage. Not for sure yet, but she has been spotting since Saturday, and it's not getting better. We were up at our cabin over the weekend and spent 5 hours in the ER, where she had an ultrasound and blood work to check her hormone levels. Today we followed up with her OBGYN (whom she hadn't even seen yet - 1st appt. was to be mid-October), and the fetus is measuring at 5.5 weeks when she should be at 7.5. Her hormone levels weren't consistent with a 7.5 week pregnancy, but the key is if they have doubled in the last 2 days. If the results of today's blood test don't show that, it will probably mean the baby has stopped growing.

Dd has been so upset and scared. After today, she is preparing herself for the worst. The timing was actually terrible, as she has 2 tests this week in her microbiology class. The professor is very strict and basically accepts NO excuses for missing tests, even though dd got a doctor's note just in case. She has decided to withdraw from the class and petition the dean's office to consider it a "drop" rather than a withdraw, which looks bad on the transcript for nursing school. I think she's making the right decision. I can't imagine having to focus on studying for 2 major tests right now. Nursing school was on hold anyway, with her plans to start a family.

Would appreciate positive thoughts for her - there's a chance that she still has a viable pregnancy, but I'm thinking the chance is more likely that she doesn't. And my heart is breaking for her!

                        Calmama54, from the beautiful


Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-1999
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 3:17am
Just got back from dd's home. She miscarried tonight, at her home. My heart is breaking for her and her hubby - they were both so excited to start a family. He is off for the next 2 days so that will be good for them both. He's been very good with her and I probably didn't need to go there, but I had to just hug her. Such a sad night! :-(

                        Calmama54, from the beautiful


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-1998
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 8:24am

I'm so sorry for you and your daughter.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 9:12am

Oh, my heart just dropped when I saw your title. But, I'm glad that you shared the news initially, so that we can all be offering prayers and support now. I think it's wise that she dropped her class. Whether or not she feels up to it physically in a few days is a very different situation from how she might feel mentally. It's a lot to go through and a lot to process emotionally. I think that getting right back into your normal routine sometimes just delays the grieving, it doesn't really make it go away. Better to deal with it and mourn her baby and go back as she feels ready.



I'm glad that her dh and you were both able to support her!



Theresa

Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 9:18am

Oh, gosh, so sorry to hear that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2007
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 9:23am
So sorry to hear about the miscarriage. Yes,your son in law probably could handle it but a daughter does need her mom at times like these. Hugs to you both.
Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 1:00pm
I'm so sorry for your dd, and the entire family. Good that she and her dh will be home for a couple of days together. P&PT to all of you.
Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 6:29pm
I know EXACTLY how you, and she, feel. PLEASE PLEASE tell your dd it's ok --even important-- for her to grieve. Some people minimize the amount of loss a miscarriage at this stage causes, and some think it's better just to get on with things, but it is still the loss of a child, and all those hopes and promise. All of you need to give yourselves permission to morn this loss, for as long as it takes. My prayers are with you, and your dd.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 6:42pm
I'm very sorry to hear that. I hope she is doing better soon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-29-2010 - 8:04am
I was so sorry to read this post. My prayers and thoughts are with your daughter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 09-30-2010 - 7:58pm
My heart aches for your daughter. I'm so sorry she and her husband are going through this. I can still vividly remember the miscarriage I had early in our marriage. THoughts and prayers for all of you.
Photobucket
Photobucket

Pages