Are you a Facebook friend of your college student.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2006
Are you a Facebook friend of your college student.
33
Wed, 10-05-2011 - 3:54pm
And at what age would you allow your child to have a facebook page?

I have not befriended my cs because it really seems intrusive. He uses Facebook to keep in touch with his friends from home and I kind of feel like it would be like following him to high school and standing next to him in the hall while he talked to his friends. Still the nosy side of me would love to know what he and his friends are up to.

As for the second question...I have a 12 year old daughter and many of her friends already have Facebook pages. I have not allowed her to have one yet. She is not driving me crazy about it, but I am sure she would like to have one. I am thinking when she enters high school, but that isn't for 2 years and I am not sure that it is realistic to keep kids off social media for that long anymore. Whet do you guys think. Tings have changed so much since her brother was in middle school and there are only 6 years between them.

Thanks for any input.

Robin

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999

I am not FB friends w/ CS (or actually now college grad).

Avatar for mahopac
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-1997

I allowed my oldest to join MySpace 6 years ago when he was 13, as long as I had access to his page, i.e. could actually log in as him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2006
LOL...I hadn't thought of him having access to my Facebook page. Actually I rarely post anything so he really wouldn't find out much info about me.

I know what your dd means about people that post too many pictures. I have a few Facebook friends from my high school that I barely remember (my graduating class had 650 people). A couple of them are constantly posting pictures of their kids. I kind of wish I could unfriend them without insulting them, but I am really not interested in daily pictures of their kids. I am sure their relatives are, but their 400+ Facebook friends could really live without it.
Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998

Yes, we are FB friends. Ds joined when it was still only for college students and when it opened up to the general public he invited me to join--which kind of surprised me as I thought he might want "privacy" from his mom on there. I waited a couple of years before joining, until more of my peers were on there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2006
Thank you for seeing my point about them having their privacy. All of my friends are fb friends with their college age kids. I don't get it. I did see his page recently and it was just really boring - although I did learn a few things about his friends. Nothing incriminating, but probably stuff that they would rather keep to themselves so I felt like I just didn't belong there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2006
Thanks for your input. Nice that your son asked you to be his friend. Maybe I should ask my son if he wants me to be his fb friend. You do make a good point. He may want me to be his friend. I use fb to keep in touch with family. Right now I am mostly friendly with the adult family members, but I have started befriending some of the cousins. Then our paths will intersect and we may enjoy being fb friends.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2009

My oldest (23) only signed up to Facebook when she was 18 and in university.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2006
There has been a big change in the past couple years. Ds(18) was not interested in fb either. He did not have a page so unfortunately someone stole his idenity on fb. Luckily he found out and we had fb shut down the imposter's page. After that I made him create a fb page to protect his idenity. He was a junior in hs. He slowly got into it and now that he is away at college he likes to use it to keep in touch with hs friends. So I completely understand when you say that the older kids/young adults are not interested.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000

I'm FB friends with both the boys - they friended me. When Jason first went away to college in 2005 FB was just for college students. A couple years later they opened it up to high school students and it quickly went from there. I'm a FB addict - I've reconnected with SO many people. Even my very first best friends from a town in MI where I lived when I was 7-8 years old. Not to mention lots of high school friends and current friends. I do make it a rule never to ask high school or college students to be friends on Facebook but if they friend me I accept. As for the age - it wasn't an issue here since as I said - back in the day it was only for college students. I think officially you're supposed to be at least 13. One of my friends has an 11 year old that has had her page shut down a couple times because the powers that be must have figured out she wasn't 13.

Pam
Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998

"I kind of wish I could unfriend them without insulting them"

You can hide them so they remain in your friends list by you don't get any of their updates. You can still go to their page if you want to see what's new with them.

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