Incident at school

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2003
Incident at school
5
Wed, 02-27-2013 - 12:22pm

I have a 12 year old ADHD/LD boy and he is who I have previously posted about.  However, my 2nd grade girl came home yesterday with a story for me about something that happened at school.  I didn't really know what to say.  There is a boy in her class and he apparently has ADHD and has an aide.  He may have other diagnoses as well, but this is what my daughter knows.  He frequently is in trouble for inappropriate behavior according to my daughter.  My daughter has a male teacher.  Apparently the teacher became very upset with the student and was yelling at him for an extended period of time.  My daughter does not know what prompted the teacher to become angry.  My daughter then says that she noticed an aide for another student with a medical condition, take out her cell phone and record the incident.  She says the aide then sent the recording to someone.  I really don't know how my daughter would know if she sent the video to someone or not but that's what she thinks happened.  I asked her if the teacher did anything physical and she said no.  I am not sure what to think about this, or what to do.  What do I tell my daughter?  Do I just keep this to myself? 

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Thu, 02-28-2013 - 9:48am

You have one side of the story, Was she harmed?  Is there a history of the teacher blowing up at kids?  Typically and only IME other kids' don't know the reasons or specific needs of other children on IEPs.  If you have a question ask the teacher but I doubt he's going to tell you much about an incident b/w him and ANOTHER student, That crosses boundaries a teacher shouldn't need to talk to you about.

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Thu, 02-28-2013 - 5:42pm

I think the aide probably thought the extended yelling session needed to be documented, maybe the aide thinks there are other problems with the teacher.  Even if the aide didn't send the video then, she probably recorded it to show to someone.  The only person she should be able to show the video to would be to the principal, otherwise if she was just sending it to her dh or friend, that would really be out of bounds/confidentiality.  

I would probably question my daughter casually to see if this yelling was worse then normal or just longer and whether she ever saw any aides video incidents like that before.  I would consider talking to the principal about it if it disturbed you or your daughter.  I might also just wait and ask my daughter to tell me if anything like that happens again.  It might also be that there are starting to be legal issues regarding the student and the school wants to document student incidents.  If the aide was videoing this for any reason other than to show the principal about some concern, she has very poor judgment.

“Clearly," said Arthur,"you're an idiot- but you're our kind of idiot. Come on.” 
― Markus ZusakThe Book Thief

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Mon, 03-04-2013 - 7:16am

kind of reminds me of the guy who took pictures as another mad fall onto tracks and killed by incoming train in NYC. My mom works in a nursing home and she once came in on an aid attaking a patient, she ran and got someone. She was so in shock she needed someone else to see but the first question she was asked why didn't she say something. My guess is aid was recording for documentation. Maybe she felt it was wrong but uneasy on her place to step in. In todays day of smart phones this is the first and won't be the last of teachers recorded. there was an incident in a local high school here and student whipped out their phones and it does eliminate some of the he said she said its there on tape, but in another case it was college kids and the ones who recorded got in trouble for not stepping in. Course in both cases it winds up on youtube first which is wrong. If I was the aid I probably would have taken out my phone but I NEVER would have sent it to anyone. Thats a walk into principals office say I saw this it seemed out of line to me. Let them decide if teacher crossed the line but NO WAY when kids under 18 are involved should that go to anyone else. Not even another teacher/aide. Its a private matter between that teacher, student, the adminstrators and parents. Schools need waivers to photograph our kids and that DOES not include cell phones and that bothers me. I have no problem with the video being taken to document but it should be fowarded to admin and then deleted from her phone. While my child was not involved I'd worry in future. I probably would leave the yelling incident to the school but find away to address teachers cell phone use. If there isn't a policy there should be one anout teachers and cell phones and images of our kids...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2003
Mon, 03-18-2013 - 8:00pm

Thanks for the replies.  I didnt get a notification that there were any replies or i would have responded sooner.  I really cant be sure that she sent the video to anyone.  The teacher doesnt have a reputation for being inappropriate in the classroom and my daughter doesnt have any concerns. Technology is a double edged sword.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2003
Tue, 03-19-2013 - 8:09am

I think anyone in my shoes would be concerned if their child came home and said that there was someone videotaping a disciplinary action in their child's classroom.  It raises questions.  I don't care what this child's diagnosis is. I would never ask for specifics about another child.  At the same time, I am concerned about what my daughter is exposed to.   I want my daughter in a nurturing environment when children are treated with respect and their privacy is not compromised.  I also understand children with special needs and the difficulties that it can pose in the classroom.  With mainstreaming, teachers have more challenging behavioral issues in the classroom and I know he doesn't have an easy job.  But, this situation is concerning.  As to the question "was she harmed?  Well, I don't know.  She was disturbed by the situation even though she wasn't directly involved.  And if she was in the video then her privacy was violated. 

This is in response to Jamesblessedthree.