Our very first IEP meeting, need concrete ideas that can help

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
Our very first IEP meeting, need concrete ideas that can help
47
Fri, 11-05-2010 - 7:13pm

My son is in grade 4 in WA State.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
Wow stardust, that's a lot- to fail a grade then start failing another. See, my son isn't failing and is actually even doing a grade 8 online program from the classroom, but he can't understand others...

The staff aren't wanting to even discuss and aide or modifying recess and PE, and don't have ideas that are going to work yet. I hope they do though because this can't be it and I feel a huge responsibility to practically have the IEP written up before any meeting in case they don't have ideas that might work themselves.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005

I misunderstood you, and thought that you were already in the process of writing an IEP.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005

Just push them...that's all I can say.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
No it's okay! I can be confusing. Thank you so much for the replies. :)

We do have an AS dx from his doctor. I actually brought it to the meeting, but nobody has questioned it yet, so I just didn't pull it out. He hasn't received services yet because he was homeschooled for the past 2 years, and before that he was at a school that really wanted him to have an IEP but we were in denial, and it went downhill with regression academically and socially.

My son's actual problems are more based on social understanding, communication, rigidity, sensory, rather than just behavioral- the behaviors start coming out because he can't deal with all that's going on around him. His teacher doesn't see him as a behavior problem at all either and finds him refreshing in her class.
So far my son has decided to try and play at recess and when it doesn't work, he's been sitting down and just waiting for it to be over so he doesn't get into trouble, or he brings a book outside to read. But that's just this week and wont last long for him since he really does want to play.

I guess I figured an IEP was a definite thing he would qualify for based on his underlying issues, but I guess not necessarily. I even assumed THEY would suggest it first! haha oops
That's a good idea- maybe when the PE teacher senses a problem, he could give him a different task.

I just wish there was a way to help him interact well with people, real social connections and understanding, and ability to handle chaotic and unstructured/ less supervised times...
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
We were replying to each other at the same time. :)
Thank you. That's just what I'll do! All of a sudden it hit me that it's all up to our family to make up and give him what he needs. I guess I always knew that, but I also thought that once I requested services, there would be more available.
Thank you again! :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
Keep pushing and keep investigating. It sounds bad but they aren't always willing to divulge everything they can offer you upfront. Our school district offers free Dyslexia tutoring but when I got my son's Dyslexia diagnoses they didn't even tell me about it. (He was tested through our local Scottish Rite) I had to dig around, find out that they had that service and after a terrible IEP meeting where they hadn't even used the word 'Dyslexia' in his IEP I stopped at the doorway as I headed out of the room and said 'isn't there Dyslexia tutoring available through our school?" the teacher was stunned and muttered 'yes' I looked at her and said 'good I want that' and walked out. I had to go over the principals head and go to the head of Special Ed. in our school district. It has not been easy but I have not given up, if I didn't like one persons answer I went over them to the next person and kept going.
And you never have to sign and IEP you don't like. Take notes of things you want to say before you go. Tell them what you want in it, you are a part of the IEP team. As long as you continue to show up to the meetings they cannot put the IEP in place without your signature, as long as you show up.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005

Ditto what Rebekah said.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2008

It is NOT legal to say to a parent "We don't do that."

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2008

ADHD is a different kettle of fish from ASD.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2004
Put in a 'request for general assessment' that will get the ball rolling.

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