Dealing with family and others
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|Wed, 07-14-2010 - 11:28am|
How do you deal with family reactions to your child's diagnosis and your decision on meds?
I've already decided not to tell my mother anything. She lives out of state and we only see her once or twice a year. She is anti-meds for almost everything. She has serious back issues and only started taking ibuprofen very recently (after years of my suggesting it) to help alleviate the pain (which it did). She's also of the school of thought that kids who act up just need "a crack on the a$$." (Thankfully I did not have ADHD.)
I just had a conversation with a friend I've recently reconnected with. He could tell I was down (we have had a bad week with outbursts) and I admitted we were going to start our son on meds for ADHD. His solution: just take him off the sugar. Oh, well, thank you. I'm glad those years of sales training have qualified you for a medical degree. The worst part is that I could hear the cogs turning in his head and him thinking - what kind of parents are these that (a) they've let their son get so out of control and (b) they're going to medicate him?
I don't want my son to be on drugs, but I want him to be happy. I want him to feel like he can control his outbursts. I want him to be able to focus in class and not make life difficult for the teacher or for himself. I want him to be able to adequately socialize with his peers so that he can have friends, so we can have friends over and me not wonder when it's going to spiral out of control. I want him to be able to get dressed in the morning and not have it be a monumental task.
My friend also brought up side effects and I"ll admit: I'm terrified of the side effects. My son needs more sleep during the school year, not less. With both of us working and homework and school starting at 7:35am, he gets as much as he can now. If meds delay sleep, I can't delay morning. And he's not a huge eater now - I hate to think of him eating less.
I normally handle everything with utter calm. But I'm really losing my composure this week.