Fustrated! Husband NOT supportive
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|Wed, 08-26-2009 - 9:17am|
Hi I've posted here once or twice before but am mostly a casual lurker! My son (5) was recently official diagnose with ADHD..something that I have actually know for years. I have been doing everything possible behavioral therapy, taking parenting skill classes, I changed his diet, gone to a homeopathic doctor. I have gone to the school and enlisted their help etc (they have been amazing etc etc) However, even with all this it has only made very minimal changes. He is extremely impulsive and has at times put himself in very dangerous situations and at the school is considered a "flight" risk. I am a stay at home mom and take care of him and my other two children 24/7. Too be fair I feel that I should also add that I too have Adult ADHD which I recently got under control about a year ago and started taking Concerta which has been a wonderful life changing opportunity for me! Not a cure ( I still have issues) but definitely has made a HUGE difference for me.
Here is where my problem comes in. The psychiatrist has recommended trying my son on medication. I have for a long time in my heart knew that it would problem come to this and have struggled with the though of putting my baby on medication (I'm sure many of you have struggled with this yourselves). HE's only 5! My family is suffering, he's suffering. He's so sad..he know's he's different, he's always getting in trouble...my husband doesn't understand ADHD . Something as simple as going to the grocery store can turn into a complete disaster. I have decided that I can be at peace with trying the medications...it's done so much for me..how can I deny him the same chance? Which makes me the better mother, giving him that opportunity to advance in life and being happy or passing it by because of concerns of ifs/maybes about "potential side effects which for myself I've chosen to risk?
My husband is TOTAL against this..NO MEDICATIONS..there is NO way his son is going on medications...How on earth can he be so blind..so ignorant? So unfair? So unwilling to even consider? What kills me is that he has been so uninvolved with this whole process. He feels that I've just not done enough..that if only I did more. He feels that I've condoned him from that start and now that I've got the diagnoses that I'm somehow happy...instead of sad that our son while have to live through the pain that I had to (or maybe not if given the opportunites that I didn't have so young). Instead of seeing it as a blessing. he is puffing out his chest and saying that phrase I am sure so many of you have heard in the past.."HE"S JUST a BOY" ....
Anyone else have this problem? How did you solve? Sorry for turning it into a kinda vent...but I'm fustrated!
Thanks for listening/reading lol