going crazy over here.

I need some help, DH and I are going crazy!!

my step-son is 9, he was recently diagnosed as

ADHD. He's on concerta right now, but it doesn't

seem to make a difference. he's extremely hard

headed and stubborn. he doesn't listen to us or

his teachers. several times in school he just

decided he wasn't going to do his work so he

didn't. needless to say he barely passed. he's

also gifted but not a bit of common sense (last

week he put a can of soup in the microwave to

heat it up, he knows better than that). he's

also very spoiled by grandma, which we are in

the process of putting a stop to it. my husband

was in the navy for the first 4 yrs of DS's life,

grandma raised him during that time. she never

disciplined him, always let him do what he wanted.

by the time he was 7 yrs old, she had bought him

a computer, sony play station, tv, vcr, dvd player,

game boy & several games. he also had a tv, own

bedroom, own playroom, vcr, and computer at her house.

now he's not ever grateful for anything we buy him.

if I buy him something and he's not with me, when

I give it to him it's not thank you, but why didn't

you buy this one or that instead. The pychiatrist

that I bring him to now for his medication doesn't

seem to help much. I told him I didn't know how to

discipline him and he just said "restriction". so

far we've done a lot of that. he doesn't have his

own tv, vcr, dvd player or computer at home (now it's

ours). we limit his time watching tv, playing video

games and time on the computer. we limit his time at

grandma's. I guess this is normal with all kids, but

nothing he ever does is his fault. it's always someone

else's. when he doesn't have his homework in school,

he tells his teacher that I took it out of his school

bag and didn't put it back.

any suggestions on how to teach him to listen to his

parents and teachers? also we'd like to teach him

responsibility.

any help would be appreciated.

thanks,

Monica